Choice of Reality
by Weave the Magic
Summary: I'm not in love with the Russian anymore. Come on! We had made love ONLY ONCE and that was freakin'7 yrs. ago! Nowadays, I do not wear rose-colored lenses, I wear red. I,Rosemarie Hathaway, declare war against the Guardian's mantra, "They come first."
1. Curve Balls

_Rose is my favorite gal, an ideal heroine. When the Morois-Dhampir world needs some major renovation, she knows the main players will do the fixing-up. A good citizen, she will do her share by teaching in St. Vladimir. But when noone is doing the hard decisions, she'll do the banging and rock the world until it's forced to stop and listen. Besides, nothing is too big for this girl - now a woman, once she puts her mind into it._

_First two chapters will be angst-filled as the story dictates. But it gets teasing and fun without losing its gravity as we go further. Hope you ride along with me. _

Curve Balls

The faces of each and every St. Vladimir Guardians wore unreadable masks, emotionless and cold; our jaws clenched hard are the only outward testament of the sorrow and pain that we suffer. This midnight (noon in the human time), while the sun is at its highest and hottest, and the Morois are still asleep, we are holding a wake for our fallen. There are no bodies to bury; because lucky are those whose remains were buried in the Moroi communities where they served and fell. We mourn for our guardians, past graduates and instructors of the Academy who died in the line of service.

We have confirmed a number of the deaths because those were reported by friends and alchemists. But a lot of the missing is still unaccounted for. We know not because there have been no official reports reaching us for some time. To ensure that we honor every departed soul, it has become a ritual now. Almost every quarter, guardians and instructors, Dhampirs and a few Morois of St. Vladimir Academy, we gather to pay homage to our dead…

Ever since that damned law on Dhampir novices graduating at the age of sixteen was passed five years ago, the toll of deaths started climbing at an obscenely alarming rate. King Nikolai Dashkov and the Moroi Royal Council, frightened by the hostile mob that stormed the Royal Court two years ago, ordered a cessation on the broadcasting of news of death and massacre pertaining to Guardian casualties. Instead, to cover-up the facts, stories of heroism and successful battles are trumpeted all over. Victorious Guardians experience their 30-minutes of fame. They are special guests in Royal Moroi Banquets, their life stories splashed in our magazines, and their fighting techniques featured in cable shows.

Still, the Dhampir communities suffer. None of us escaped untouched. Nightmares of our dead children and siblings are etched on our faces.

Based on the pecking order of our existence, top of the food chain are the Strigois. The strigois are the feared vampires of the humans, and with good reason. When turned into strigois, all newborns are stripped of their goodness and humanity but none of the intelligence of their original self. They gain enormous strength and speed. They exist mainly on blood and they enjoy draining their victims to death. Victims, being the morois, dhampirs and humans. Not entirely invulnerable, they can be killed by silver stakes, burned, or decapitated, if you are fast and strong enough to catch them.

Next are the Morois. The Morois' similarity to the strigois end on both needing to feed on blood. Since the Morois eat normal foods too, they do not depend solely on blood nor do they drain their feeders; not unless they want to turn into Strigois. Although slower and physically weaker than Dhampirs, they have one major ability that we don't have. They can procreate. Basically, the computations for babies in the Moroi-Dhampir existence go: Moroi + Moroi = Baby Moroi; Moroi + Dhampir = Baby Dhampir; Moroi + Human = Baby Dhampir; Dhampir + Dhampir (or Human) = 0 Baby.

Which brings us to the Dhampirs. Although stronger, faster, and just as intelligent as the Morois, due to our dependence on the Morois for the survival of our kind, we are the bottom dwellers. Sad to say, if I include the unsuspecting humans, they are even higher than us because they don't need either Morois or Dhampirs to multiply. Thus, with the threat of the Strigois, we assumed the role of defenders to our Morois, and the Morois assumed the governance of the Morois-Dhampir society.

Rosemarie Hathaway, Guardian and Instructor for more than six years at St. Vladimir Academy. That will be the summarized version of my job experience in my bio-data if I ever start looking for a new profession.

I studied and graduated here at St. Vladimir Academy, along with my best friend, Princess Vasilisa Dragomir, the last legitimate Dragomir. The Dragomirs are part of one of the twelve ruling families in the monarch government of the Morois and Dhampirs. Lissa and I thought we will forever be together. While she promised that she would take part in the Moroi politics so she can look after the welfare of Dhampirs, I promised to be always by her side and protect her from danger.

My bosom buddy, aside from being a Moroi Royalty, can wield the rare element of spirit. As a spirit user, Lissa has the ability to cure the sick, grow plants, and bring back the dead. I am relieved to say that I am her greatest miracle. I was killed from a car crash along with her parents and brother, but she snatched me back as ole Grim Reaper was about to embrace me tightly for my eternal sleep.

But using this magnificent spirit element did not come free, she absorbs dark energies and it builds up and causes her emotional and mental breakdown. It's probably an exchange of opposite energies. When she uses her spirit element, she gives the positive energy to whomever she is healing and these lost energy is replenished by her patients with sickly negative energy. This negative energy causes darkness in her aura. If the darkness becomes too much, she would probably become insane.

Since 15 years old, I have been bonded to Lissa, shadow-kissed with an innate Strigoi-alarm, and a believer of ghosts coz they regularly hold a meeting with me once I step out of the wards of protected Moroi areas. Now aside from the usual hazards of strigois and possible assassins, I also absorb her darkness to keep her sanity intact. My own emotional and mental breakdown, once I absorb the darkness, is secondary, in my opinion. After all, I do owe her my life and the future security of the Dhampirs. She would always come first.

Or so I thought… But life throws a curve ball once in awhile. In fact I believe that all that life served me were curve balls.

My mother, Guardian Janine Hathaway, a legend in her own right, left me at the Academy when I was 3 years old so she can serve and guard her Moroi without worrying about me. She further excused her abandonment (I've always called a spade, a spade) because she wanted me to grow-up to be a guardian instead of a bloodwhore. In my mother's opinion, those are the only future for dhampir women…

At 17, I was lucky enough to be mentored by one of the most formidable guardians (at least in my opinion) so I would be worthy of being the guardian of Princess Lissa Dragomir. But I got thrown with a curve ball when I fell head over heels in love. This was how Dimitri Belikov, my personal Russian god and lover, became an integral part of my barely 18 years of existence. Falling in love was not a tragedy, especially since Dimitri fell as passionately as I did. With our feelings so intense, we were confident we could work out the complications of both being guardians after my graduation…

But life decided I had not enough. It pitched me another curve ball when a strigoi grabbed Dimitri and turned him into one of them. I was not called Badass Rose for nothing, I will not let mere monsters destroy the soul of my mate. And for the first time in our lifetime of friendship, I tested my bond with Lissa by leaving her behind the Academy. I set out to kill my strigoi lover but ended up with a failed quest and a fairytale hope of bringing Dimitri back to life. And to me.

If you will ask me how I will describe my 18year old self, I would describe me as passionate, tenacious, foolhardy and STUPID. I was too ignorant to see that our mission could have failed. I was heedless on what havoc an escape convict can create, and definitely too reckless of my own safety, my friends', and that of my promised charge, Lissa.

I do believe that somebody out there was looking after me when I chose my best friend. Despite leaving her behind and endangering her precious life, Lissa helped me bring back my Dimitri. I couldn't have done it without her. Her special spirit element was needed to turn the love of my life back to his Dhampir self. With her help, we can continue our love me and spend our life together as planned. Ever since I professed my love for him, however hard I kick and protest, I knew I would follow Dimitri to set the direction of our joint life.

Although I was not an awesome baseball player I have always been a decent hitter, being the crass, feisty, bull-headed person that I am. But I have never mastered the curve balls. Probably that is the reason why life loves to serve me curve balls. And that particular cruel ball, when I thought everything would finally go my way, side-blinded me so hard it almost broke me to pieces.

My Russian god, my lover, the integral part of my short 18 years, the only person who caused me to forget my oath to Lissa, refused to have me back! He said his love faded, (but damn it!) mine had not. And irony of ironies, he swore to protect no other except Lissa. It crushed my heart but I guess that was bi-polar justice. Since I abused what I used to believe was the reason for my birth, my other half ripped his self apart from me to fulfill my promised allegiance to Princess Vasilisa Dragomir. And justice for all… Of them.

Afterwards, I threw my own curve ball. Emotionally wrecked, sore loser and wailing brat that I was, instead of maturely accepting the consequences of my choices and proceeding to be one of the guardians of Lissa, I ran back to school. I needed to go back to the only home I knew to become whole again.

But it was actually not an altogether selfish reason why I went back to St. Vladimir. As the best graduate that the school had ever produced, thanks partly to my faithless former instructor, I wanted to turn my frustration into something constructive by dedicating my time teaching the novices.

And that was how I found myself with a job experience of over six years as Academy Guardian and Instructor...if I ever I have to submit my bio-data.

After all those curve balls pitched by life, I am not ashamed for choosing St. Vladimir over Lissa. When the Change in Age of Guardianship was enacted a year after, I found myself more needed in the Academy.

I love Lissa and we've always kept in touch. I do not have to guard her safety from strigois and other attacks, Dimitri and my former classmate Eddie Castille have that efficiently covered; but I can still absorb her darkness even from afar. Because we are distantly apart, I can be emotionally disattached to her distress and it's easier to expel the negative spirit through physical exertion and fights. And she had a lot of pain during the last three years. Her relationship with Christian Ozera did not end well. Her studies at the university away from the Royal Court, King Nikolai and majority of the Moroi Royals being against the Ozeras, resulted to bitter arguments, jealousy and finally, separation. Couple that with her integration to the Moroi politics, the backstabbing and the stress of being part of the Royal Council took a lot from her naturally trusting persona.

But I am proud of my friend. I can truly say she was born to be a member of the Royal Council, probably better than her dead brother Andre. Hopefully she'll be elected Queen in the future. At only 24 yrs old, she has matured into an astute, cunning, determined politician and is now a seasoned player of Moroi politics; but thank God, she has loads of compassion for non-royal Morois and Dhampirs.

Another defender of the Dhampirs is Lady Tasha Ozera. She is the aunt of Christian, former boyfriend of Lissa. Tasha is a Moroi martial arts black belter, consummate combatant using fire element, proponent of Morois learning offence and defence using their elements, and sadly, sister and sister-in-law to Morois-Volunteer-Strigois, Christian's parents.

Tasha and Christian, although part of the ruling royal families, became undesirables when Christian's parents willingly turned to strigois. For a long time the Council did not assign her a guardian. I am relieved that they granted the request of my mother that Tasha and Christian to be under her charge.

But with only two champions in the governing council, the inevitable rape of our race cannot be fully stopped, especially if the administration's majority is made-up of terrified royals. With the previously ragtag strigois now organized and lead by skillful leaders plus the assassination of Queen Tatiana, the Monarchs panicked. Tatiana was replaced by King Nikolai Vincent Dashkov (heaven forbid!), nephew of escaped convict ex-Prince Victor Dashkov.

They speedily passed and acted on the law on novices graduating at 16, so did the law that Dhampirs are forbidden to marry Morois. They argue that Morois must marry Morois to ensure the continuing existence of Morois and Dhampirs. Another bill passed is all male Dhampirs have to serve as guardians until the age of 40 and women until 30, although it is waiting at the sideline to be executed. This particular law is bound for modification as soon as the law on all Dhampir women, from the age of 18-22 years old, are subject to at least bear one Dhampir child. If this legislative passes, somehow my mother will be correct. Dhampir women are suitable to be guardians but just as good to be bloodwhores.

For the egocentric Moroi Royals, it is the responsibility of the female dhampirs to procreate with male Morois to produce more of our kind to ensure the continuing safety of the delicate Morois… They condescendingly hale us as the Heroes of the Moroi–Dhampir Society.

The council threw us a pittance, through the lobbying of Lissa and Tasha, by putting up gymnasiums to teach interested Morois to learn defense/offense combat using their elements. But the law on combat classes being included in the Morois school curriculum, has so far been rejected.

With all these going on, I knew I had reached the end of being the efficient, reliable, guardian-instructor. I felt constrained, useless and most of all confused. For so long now, I have been questioning the wisdom in preparing our novices only to lead them to their death march. I have hidden myself inside the safe womb of St. Vladimir Academy.

Enough! It is time for Rosemarie Hathaway to shake things up. I want to roar and I want the world to listen to my grievances!


	2. Animal Farm

_A piece of my mind:_

_I'm aware that a lot of the readers are familiar with VA series but I'm hoping I'll have the guts to show this to my personal Dimitri who'll be needing a very quick history on VA…Chap.2 sets my present reality of the Moroi-Dhampir world and Rose's need for choice. Both first 2 chapters are pretty heavy but I will try to lighten afterwards... I'm seeing that a chapter or 2 later on will be for Mature readers. Will either put a heads-up or do a short separate fanfic for that._

_Original VA story and ideas for upcoming chapters are definitely not mine...Thanks to Wikipedia for short quick facts; my collection of novels to help me with lemons and fight scenes, Jane Austen for Mr. Darcy with whom I'm comparing Dimitri, Charlaine Harris for Eric Northman coz I see him in Adrian, and Richelle Mead for her VA series and all her characters. Richelle made her books so interesting it made us daydream and escape._

_Thanks for dropping by. Hope you'll take the time to read this and share with me a piece of your mind. Reviews will make it fun coz we'll be daydreaming together. We'll be like Adrian and Rose dream walking._

Animal Farm

"Come in Guardian Hathaway, you asked to talk to me and Guardian Petrov?"

"Thank you for meeting with me right away Headmistress Kirova. I just want to inform you both that I will not be coming back after this school year ends."

Alarm and hurt show on both faces of the elder Moroi and Dhampir. Guardian Petrov voiced out her appeal. "You know how difficult instructors are nowadays, Rose. The students have benefited on your passion and dedication. St. Vladimir has the least number of casualties among the new guardians…"

"But there are still a lot of deaths, Guardian Petrov. You are talking about statistics, but I see my novices, dead at 16 or 17." I can feel a mild hysteria surfacing. "Those who we hope are still alive, they keep me awake every night. I panic when we receive news from the outside. I am afraid to hear the new list of dead names."

Alberta Petrov has been a Guardian longer than my mother. She is respected by her peers and is a favorite of the novices in St. Vladimir. She has faced strigois by the numbers and dealt with badass students like me but I have never seen her lose her composure. I have regarded her as an aunt while growing-up in this school. Now here she is pleading for me to stay.

"Rose, not at this moment. Not when the students' morale are at its lowest. Don't go please. The Academy needs your help to keep it all together."

"The school does have other equally capable and dedicated instructors, Alberta."

"But being the youngest instructor, our students identify so much with you. I see them following you and hanging on to your every word. Our novices are passionate on being their best. They try their hardest for you because you give them hope. You are their living proof that they can do this terrible duty.

You were the Novice who was able to defeat 2 strigois and had a battle-ax tattoo before your promise mark at graduation. Because of you, they know it can be done."

Incredibly, Headmistress Kirova entreated, "Guardian Hathaway, please understand that there can be more deaths if our students see you leaving. They will think that you've given up. A lot of them will be terrified. They're not even in the battlefield, yet they think they have already lost.

If you go, it is like putting a nail in their coffins."

"Don't you dare put under my conscience the death of these children, Kirova! You want the loss of life to lessen? Make St. Vladimir refuse to graduate 16 year old novices and let them go when they are properly seasoned at the age of 18! You, as the headmistress, are just as answerable for burying our graduates. You are letting St. Vladimir turn into an animal farm. We raise our young, fatten them up, then at 16, we send our Youths to be slaughtered!"

My eyes blazing, I say my next words with so much malice.

"Is it because you are a Moroi and we are just expendable Dhampirs?"

Alberta intervened "Rose, that's not true!"

Kirova is livid.

"All these years I pride myself to be iron-fisted specially with my novices because I know my Dhampir graduates should have mastered all their lessons. I have to see them meet my standards to be called Guardians! Guardians cannot afford mistakes because the costs are too high. I never hesitated to fail undeserving novices. I wanted to kick you out when you were a novice, had Guardian Belikov not offered to mentor you. Because aside from Princess Vasilisa's life, your unruly behavior could have caused you yours. Better a failed novice than a dead Guardian.

I do not mind being the most hated in this Academy. I do not care because I am too concerned to keep all of you alive when you are already outside these walls!"

But I have bottled up this anger for so long I cannot do anything but attack the first Moroi I can blame all my rage and pain.

"But all of that means nothing nowadays. Open your eyes Headmistress Kirova, they are still dying and our graduates are dropping like flies! You know why? Because you are spineless." I snarled.

"Right now, you are just as ineffective as those propaganda that are trumpeted in the Moroi cities. All because you do not have the guts to say NO!"

Kirova aged 10 years after my last outburst. I forced her with the truth but I am aghast on the hate that I slammed to her face. Defeated, she sits down behind her desk. Guardian Alberta Petrov rushing to her colleague's side.

Her voice dead, Kirova answers.

"You, Vasilisa, Eddie Castille, your self-sacrificing friend Mason, the Ozera boy, Christian, and so many others before you are proof of the excellence of St. Vladimir. I pride myself to be an excellent administrator. I have also believed in following our Monarchs. The Royal Council has come up with a lot of hard laws in the past, but we are still here. Despite the growing threat of the strigois and paranoid ignorant humans, Moroi-Dhampir existence is very much alive and flourishing.

I have never been a rabble-rouser, all I know is how to be a good citizen. I am a follower, and I help maintain order in my own way. It has always worked in the past. But now…"

Apologizing, the Headmistress of St. Vladimir Academy sorrowfully looks at me and say. "I just never learned how to say NO, Rose."

I could have kicked myself for belittling everything that Kirova did for us.

"I am so sorry Headmistress, that was unfair. We have all been together for over 6 years and I saw how hard it was for you too. What I said about you being spineless, that's not true. We have failed and kicked out a lot more students in the last 3 years. You have never given us direct instructions but we all know it's the Academy's way of fighting back. You do care, and you do say No."

Then I look at them straight in their eyes, hoping that they will understand.

"But I know I can't stay. I am desperate for change. I need to go back to the Royal Court."

Sighing, Alberta agreed. "I agree with you Rose. I am actually surprised it took 6 years for you to leave us." She sadly smiled at Kirova, "Ellen, we know this is coming. You know St. Vladimir's rebel will have to start shaking things up. She has been caged long enough."

"You won't be a Hathaway without that infamous temper of yours." Kirova smiles.

"But you get things done, Rose. And Guardian Petrov and I expect to hear soon that members of the Royal Council are trembling and crying for their mommies." She chuckles.

I came up long ago with a variation of my Man-Eater Grin to avoid polluting the young minds of my male novices. I smiled what I now call my Half-Assed Smirk. "But I bet their mommies are already hiding."

* * *

Back in my room, I started planning my next moves. I considered living with Lissa, but shot it down right away. I know I can gain her support for my initial plans, but I have to protect her stature once her best friend starts messing up with the Royal Court. I do not want to take my chances ruining her reputation.

Plus there is her guardian, Dimitri Belikov. I am definitely not in love with the Russian anymore. Despite the heavy drama that I went through with the man, I realized we had actually made love ONLY ONCE. And that was when I was 17 years old. However toe-curling the sex was, it was freakin' more than 7 years ago!

I am now my own person, gone are the days of the blushing teen. I will follow my lead and take care of my needs. I came up with a personal rule: I will not hang-on to a man's arse however great a lay he is if he does not get in touch with me after a month. A woman's got to know how to have her _Aww!_ scratched and satisfied. Since I am not in a serious relationship and have no intention of being in one, I will not hesitate to meet up with a consenting human male adult outside the school with whom I can scratch and get satisfied with.

But I digress…I can't live with Lissa because I cannot see Dimitri and Eddie's immediate support. Truth be told, I foresee my mother, Guardian Janine Hathaway, who no doubt has attended numerous Moroi-Honoring-Guardians Royal Banquets, to be a major pain in the arse. These highly skilled and extremely disciplined guardians are trained to defend and obey. "They come first" is the Guardians' no.1 rule.

But I want to trumpet conflicting beliefs...

I believe in "We are Able". I believe on empowering everyone. I believe that Moroi and Dhampir society will not survive if the dhampirs will continuously be treated as the 2nd rate citizen of our joint existence. I believe I should have more choices on what I want to be and not be limited to being a guardian or a blood whore. I believe that all of us have the responsibility to defend ourselves. I believe that I have the choice who to love and be with. I believe I can eventually choose my family over those who I work for. I believe I do owe my time and loyalty to those who are charged to me but not 24 hours a day, nor 7 days a week. I believe that my life outside work belongs to me and my family.

There are a lot more I Believes, but only one Demand that I am working on to become our reality. I am not even sure if Lissa will accept it at this moment, nor Tasha, nor my Moroi father. Ultimately, I will rouse my fellow Dhampirs to demand that we should be governing alongside with the Morois; the same number of seats in all branches of our government. I have enough of others manipulating our lives. Down with the absolute rule of the Morois.

But for now, I need a rebel-rouser. Somebody used to shocking the court.


	3. Must Have A Moroi

_I am tickled pink with the number of visitors and specially, to those who wrote your __Reviews__... Tickle me a lot __more Please__. I relish the experience.  
I admit that all characters and original plot is all due to Richelle Mead's VA series. We wouldn't have the fun in Chap. 3 if not for her._

Must Have a Moroi

I arrived at the Royal Court at 12 midnight, noon in human time. I chose to arrive this late so I can settle properly in our place. By our place, I meant the Hathaway-Mazur pad. The 2-story, 3-bedroom unit was bought 2 months ago by Ibrahim "Abe" Mazur aka Turkish/Russian suspected Mafia, aka Zmey the "snake", aka Janine Hathaway's sperm donator, aka Rosemarie Hathaway's father; when I called him at St. Vladimir.

I first met my father when I was 18 years old at Siberia, definitely my favorite curve ball. After the initial explosives of meeting a never met mobster of a dad, he and I just jelled. He calls me Kizim or Kiz and I'm now calling him Baba when I feel the mood.

I am the female version of my father. We both have these exotic features. I love it when he says that I look like the desert-princess of his childhood tales. We both have tanned skin, mine is of golden tan, and his is a grayish sort that has sadly not seen the sun for some time; we have dark hair, mine is dark brown almost black, his is black; both our eyes are brown, with his more deep-set; and the mark of a true Mazur, full red lips. Just like other Morois, he is tall. While at 5'7" I am slightly pulled down by my 5ft. mother. As a Moroi he is in very good physical condition. He is just as toned and muscular as I am, though of course I have the curves and ample bosom that causes a lot of my male novices to stare and drool, proving that I am the female Mazur offspring.

He told me that I have two younger Moroi brothers from two different mothers. Abe said he has been going around too much that his inamoratas got tired of following him. I am his eldest and his only daughter so my old man indulged me. And he was very proud of my escapades when I was updating him on my past. There was no shaking of the head or "Rosemarie Hathaway, what did you do this time?" The guy was preening like a cock, he kept on saying "That's my girl!" or "A Mazur through and through!". We've been having a blast being together ever since… But I am glad I met him when I was eighteen. By then the Hathaway sense of right is the backbone of my values. And I admit I love it when he spoils me. It is such a nice break from my rigid Guardian lifestyle.

I knew my father would support me. He has always been the non-conformist, and found the Moroi-Dhampir order of society ridiculous. He is probably accused of criminal activity because he would not abide by their rules. Although suspected, they cannot reject him either in the Royal Courts if he wants to witness the public proceedings. Whatever suspicions they have on him he has never been convicted. Besides, he knows almost everybody's skeleton; it will take a very brave or lily-white politician to bar him.

Sadly though, Abe Mazur is not a royal and he can only provide me his wisdom and advice, living allowance, and living quarters. So I still need someone to eventually get me in the Royal Court as a participant.

* * *

When a guardian arrives in a Moroi community, we have to report to the Guardians' Headquarters so we can pitch in somehow in maintaining its safety. As I am approaching the building, I try to guess some reactions that the news will cause when they learn that I left St. Vladimir Academy. Actually, I am just expecting raised eyebrows, nothing graver than that. But I still planned to be there at the earliest possible time so I will encounter the least number of people.

As I enter, there are only two guardians doing the early paper work. I approach a familiar face that I used to greet every time I have to go to the headquarters at the Royal Court. I can't recall her name but the old guardian has always been very friendly.

"Guardian Hathaway! Did St. Vladimir send you with the list of new graduates? We are not expecting that until later this month. You guys have always been fast."

Just as I am about to answer, I hear a group of guardians enter the room probably to get their assignments for the day. Just my luck!

"No, I don't have them. The academy will be sending their representative later this month. I am here to report that I am no longer connected with the school and would be applying for guardianship as soon as I find a Moroi who will find me suitable for such assignment."

"Oh my! But what will happen to the poor children?"

Darn! Why is the room so quiet all of a sudden?  
"We thought you've been doing excellently there. We have noted that St. Vladimir graduates are exceptionally fine and Headmistress Kirova reported that you are largely responsible for that. It's a shame if you will leave the school. It is obvious that you have the calling to be an instructor."

Dear me, I forget that the reason I did not get too close with grandma here is because she loves to prattle away. And she's doing it now with much relish and loudly too.

"I have been with St. Vladimir for six years. I would like to have a different assignment now. The Academy understands this."

"You can go to a different school perhaps, Miss?" A voice hisses at the back.

I whirled and spotted a stunning brunette, her cat eyes keenly looking at me. She's probably 19yrs. old, definitely not a day older than 20. But I wonder why she looks a bit pissed?

"I am looking for other assignments. I would like to live here in the Royal Court for a change." I choose to ignore the "Miss".

"Oh! But if you expect to find a Moroi to guard here in the Court, you might have to wait for a long time. All those who need guardian services and are residing here are already assigned with seasoned personal guardians. There are no available vacancies for Royal Court Guardians either." Another one answered.

"If I were you, I'd look for offers outside the Court."

"But it would probably be best if you take another TEACHING assignment since you have great credentials as an instructor. I am sure there will be a clamor of offers, Miss…"

Dang! I see all eyes trained on me and not one of them look friendly. What did I do to these guardians, especially to Pissy-Kitty?

"GUARDIAN Rosemary Hathaway. I think you have forgotten your basic Guardian Courtesy by calling me Miss. Do you need to go back to school for a refresher, Guardian?"

I then turn back to ole grandma behind the desk, give her my half-assed smirk, and talk loud enough for everyone to hear. "I will be back to file a formal request when I have me a Moroi. Expect me please no later than a fortnight."

It would have been such a great Hathaway performance have I not been stopped. As I am leaving the room, a familiar pair of brown caramel eyes captured me. They belong surprisingly to a still magnetic but seething 6'7" brutish Russian. Oh my god! A towering inferno!

"Angry much Guardian Belikov?" Hah! I've learned that from my kids.

"Just as I thought. You'll be back!" He spat. The nerve! I actually felt the blast of air hitting my face!

"What the…."

I refuse to hurl profanities at the Russian arse. I have successfully cleansed my mouth for the sake of my novices, and I do not intend to start again as soon as I leave the academy… Arse, however, is part of my compromise list.

But oooh, after these hostile guardians, I do not intend to let this incident with that hulk of a monster pass. That Moron (another word in my list) thinks he can just wallop me then leave? Oh, I have been away too long for him to think that he can get away with it!

We are in the middle of the street when I am finally able to catch up with him.

"Hey Hulk! What's that stuck high-up in your ass that causes you to attack me when we've only seen each other for hardly a minute?"

"You call that an attack? You are going soft, Guardian Hathaway." He sneered.

"Hardly a welcome, Bean Brain." I am so frustrated with Impossible Hulk in front of me coz he is being very antagonistic. And I'm equally frustrated that I am limiting myself to elementary profanity!

"You left St. Vladimir?" an eyebrow going up.  
Hmp! I still can't do that stuff, so I just glare my darn-est.

"I think you've already heard my current state of employment back in the office."  
I certainly do not have any intentions to tell this man my plans here.

He lowers his baritone to his much remembered, earthy voice.  
"Explain to me Roza, with competent guardian instructors hard to find nowadays, harder still for highly-regarded instructors such as you, why did you leave your novices at St. Vladimir vulnerable with one less instructor?"

"I gave the Academy enough time to look for my replacement."

"Do you really think that Headmistress Kirova can find an experienced guardian who will be allowed to leave to teach, with all these ongoing battles against the strigois? Are you really willing to risk the lives of your students with newly graduate guardians just so you can seek glory here at the Court?"

"The last time I checked in the Academy's records, I've graduated almost 7 years ago. I do not have to explain myself to my former mentor, Comrade."

"You know Rosemarie Hathaway, this conversation is a waste of breath. It is universally known that once you've made your mind up to have an adventure, you will abandon those entrusted to you. You are again proving to everyone that you are pigheaded and self-centered!"

When I was a novice I have always tried to follow my former Russian god, and for old times sake, I will do so again. So instead of wasting my breath, I have decided to let my hand do the talking. I send my message through express mail and use his left eye as the post office. POW! I'm sure he got the message as he stagger. His long brown hair flailing all over his chiseled face.

Suddenly, I feel strong hands clamping my arms at my side. Too late, only now did I become aware that the guardians from the headquarters followed us.

"Hey none of that! Are you crazy?"

"Is this what you teach your novices? To start a brawl?"

"What? Your Guardian Hulk there started it!" I countered.

"I did not! I was just talking to you." The Russian arse growled.

Then pretty Pissy-Kitty added, "If this is how violent you are, it will be no surprise if you were actually relieved by your school, MISS!"

That's it, gloves off!  
"You do not know who I am. You did not even hear what Hulk there said to me but you freakin' mouth me off? Oh! I get it! He's probably screwing your brains off and you've cummed it all out, Pussy!"

Somehow, I am able to disentangle myself, got into my fighting stance, and crazily I'm ready to take-on Pissy-Kitty, Impossible Hulk, the guardian who held me and whoever wants to join in the fray…

"Wait! Stop this! Let her be." Russian arse incredibly comes to his senses.

"Fuck it Dimitri! That bitch deserves a lesson." Kitty is still spewing.

"I don't think you'll be able to bring me to school, Kitty."

"Stop it Rose! For once hold your tongue and act your age… And the rest of you go home or do your tasks. We will all come out as an embarrassment when word spreads that the Royal Court Guardians cannot control their temper, much more jump on a lone guardian from outside the Court."

I hold my tongue to let the guardians leave. But when just the two of us are left behind, I set him straight.

"Do not play me for a fool, Belikov! I am no country bumpkin nor are you the peacemaker. The next time we meet, you will NOT treat me like a 17year old idiot. If you do that again, I will make you regret that you did not remain a Strigoi!"

Then I leave the towering Dimitri Belikov with an expression of having a stick-way-up-his-Russian-arse in the middle of the road.

As I am walking back to my place, I realize what I have done. Way to go Rose! I have definitely left Guardian Rosemarie Hathaway indelibly marked in those guardians' brains. Darn it! I better find me a Moroi fast!


	4. Grindin' and Thrustin'

Thanks to Wikipedia for teaching me to the moves. Again, I would not have this much fun writing this chapter w/o Richelle Mead. All original characters and plots of VA belongs to her.

Grinding and Thrusting

I am made-up, perfumed, donned in gunmetal ultra mini-dress and thigh-high boots, and getting sick and tired of my 4th night of clubbing.

After I announced in the Guardian Headquarters at the Royal Court that I left St. Vladimir, I thought I will find my unsuspecting Moroi there. Little did I know that my Moroi left for Memphis. So once again I packed a few clothes, headed down South and have been going in and out of clubs and watering holes for what now feels like an eternity.

The multitude of faces are dizzying. So much to look at to find my usually intoxicated Moroi. Why in the world did I broadcast in that office that I'd be back with a charge within a fortnight? I know I am over reacting, but I feel I'm in a race to save my face from Pissy-Kitty and her troupe.

I will cripple that boozer when I get my hands on him!

For the nth time, I enter a typical smoke-filled bar, the place packed with humans, mixed with a number of morois and dhampirs. I can feel the sexual electricity buzzing in the air. It's a Special Elvis Night because the performers were strictly screened. Only males who look similar and can dance lustfully those hot and sexy gyrating, hip jerking moves of the Elvis of 1950's and 60s are invited to perform. A lot of them are not even professional impersonators but they are the heartthrobs of the modern Elvis wannabes. All of them are considered Kings and their egos get inflated and satisfied when they see the libidos of their audience work overtime. Of course, free casual sex has always been part of the perks of the job.

The promise of the special show definitely piqued my curiosity since I have not been attending to my Aww! lately, and it's suddenly clamoring for attention. Probably, it's high time to try a hot-blooded Presley and turn that man's night oh so lucky.

A drop-dead gorgeous Elvis just finished his set and women are going wild like teakettles screaming their heat off. The houselights lit up while the stage lights dim to signal a short break, giving time for everyone to catch their breath. I inched my way to the bar to get myself a margarita.

Then as the surrounding dims again and the stage lights turn on, pandemonium break loose when all the male-starved members of the crowd see the next Elvis performer. I am flabbergasted and my mouth is hanging wide-open! I am having a hard time breathing coz my heart is beating so fast.

This King vows decadent fantasies. He is leggy at about 6'3", his arms and body flaunts sinewy muscles, his striking emerald green eyes hypnotize and possess. And his mouth charms us to take a bite before he devours us whole.

As the music starts, he slowly lifts his right heel off the ground, gyrates his pelvis and ever so slightly thrusts his hips sensuously towards his gaping audience. Suddenly he shakes his head hard, a strand of brown hair teases his pouty lips as the beat picks up. The females swoon once he starts singing with his seductive but still high-powered voice, his arms spread wide to embrace his adoring fans. The music in full swing, his legs shake uncontrollably then moves to intense pelvic gyrations combined with hips thrusting! thrusting! thrusting! His glorious scepter magnificently conspicuous, forcing us to fantasize and wonder. A stunning woman turned whore obviously can't wait to find out. She jumps to the stage, reaches for his equally delectable hard buns, and presses her body hard on Elvis, grinding along with him. A second harlot quickly followed and sandwiches him in between. Curse those lucky witches! Before he lets the bouncer get the crazed tramps off the stage, the King indulges them by nuzzling his nose behind their ears seductively. I go on watching the rest of his fantastic show licking my lips again and again.

At the end of his set, he leaves all of us hungry, hot and bothered. Aww! I swear I will collect videos of the young Elvis Presley. Coz if this Elvis can make my blood boil with those grinds and thrusts, oh! uh! ahh!, I'll make my male buddies learn those moves and hold an Elvis Night when I want me a special time.

Sadly, I can't touch this Elvis…

I made my way towards him as soon as he goes down the stage. I wait for my turn until all the room keys and thongs are secreted in his pockets.

"Had I known you could do those moves with your hips, I wouldn't have left you at the sidelines when we were in St. Vladimir. I probably would have foregone my quest for the Russian arse had you given me a private show!" I definitely flash him my original MAN-EATING GRIN.

"Little Dhampir! Are you as hot and wet as I am?" He wiggled his brows suggestively, his face and body all sweaty.

We both laughed and embraced each other tightly.

"Adrian, that was superb! I didn't know you can rock and sing like that."

"Well, if you'll let me bring you to my room, I can show you every grind and thrust and wiggle these hips can do."

"Flirt! That's not going to work on me, Ivashkov. After all these years, I think I'm immune from you my Dear."

There is no need for him to know that his show earlier caused my heart to beat like a locomotive. It's important that we keep our relationship friendly and professional.

"My Dear? Oh my god, I think I have been treated like a novice by the highly-acclaimed St. Vladimir instructor." Adrian assumed a fake hurt expression on his face.

"Okay, I'll make it up to you by treating you to a nightcap after you're through here. I'll help you catch up with the Rose's latest news."

"Then we can leave anytime you're ready. I don't work here, Rose. I just need to do this once in awhile coz I'm an egoistical SOB."

"But King Elvis, do you have any change of clothes? With pants like that, I would be too busy defending myself from your sex-starved minions. It will be impossible to talk to you."

"And here I am thinking you wanted to parade me outside, butt and all!"

He huffed and turned his back on me to change. My eyes followed those buns until they disappear.

* * *

Lord Adrian Ivashkov has been a close friend of mine since our days at St. Vladimir. He is another spirit user, specializing in dream walking. Although four years older than us, he requested to live in the academy so he and Lissa can explore the unknown spirit element.

Widely known as a player, he flirted with me unabashedly, always ready with his suggestive remarks and visited me in my dreams. He chased me for a long time, openly expressed his heartfelt love and helped me with my quest to put to death, ultimately bring back to his original dhampir state, Dimitri Belikov.

Time and time again, Adrian proved to be a surprisingly faithful suitor and friend. But I was besotted then with my Russian god and did not give him much credit. By the time I realized his steadfastness and devotion, I have decided to go back to St. Vladimir.

Besides, Adrian and I are never meant to be. He is an Ivashkov, son of one of the high-ranking royals, the favorite nephew of the former Queen Tatiana, and former candidate to assume the highest office, King of Moroi-Dhampir society. A member of the Moroi governing body with a dhampir wife will never be tolerated, much more a King with a dhampir queen.

Nowadays though, he is acting the part of a Royal outcast. His sin is being the son of one of the brains of the assassination of the Queen six years ago, Daniella Ivashkov. His mother, being a high-ranking royal, was found innocent of the crime for reason of insanity to lessen the political impact on the prominent Ivashkov clan. She was sentenced to stay in the mental asylum for the rest of her life. Even Adrian is not sure why his mother did it. She was probably sick of waiting for the Queen to abdicate her office and would like her husband, Prince Nathan Ivashkov, to become king.

Unlike Tasha, Adrian left the Royal Court, assuring the seat of the Ivashkovs in the court to his cousin John Edward, when Nathan was forced to resign.

Sitting at the café, he dazzles me with his smile.

"What brings you to Memphis, Little Dhampir?"

"You. I've been looking for you for four dizzying nights."

"I didn't know my Elvis act is so famous it reached the Academy."

Turning serious, I reply. "I resigned my post in St. Vladimir, Adrian."

Still refusing to be grave, Adrian teases, "And you gave that up because you want to be the assistant of King Elvis?"

"I'm pretty sure you know why I'm here."

The smile leaves his face instantly, replaced with a frown.

"No Rose, I will not go back with you."

"Adrian, it's time to stop running. You were indifferent with Moroi politics when your father was part of it, but then you abandoned your seat to your cousin when your father resigned."

"Little Dhampir, Johnny Boy has much right to that position as I have."

"It's been awhile. You have not even tried to regain it back. Though your mother was involved in the assassination, we all know that even years ago, you could easily gotten back the seat of your father from John.

You are a natural politician, Adrian. You've got the charm and the wit. You've always been popular among the Morois and have loyal followers among the dhampirs. The Royals would gladly return the seat to you to avoid protests from the public."

"Come on Rose, adoring fans do not automatically lead to supporters."

"Don't belittle those who believe in you by comparing them to your screaming audience. Besides you've never shown any serious interest in government.

But nobody is blind to your charities and medical missions."

"Pah! Those are just a way to go around. It's no fun drinking with the same people all the time. And I should share. If you ask me, the family has too much green bucks it's almost obscene."

I refuse to budge. "Try saying that to Lord John Edward Ivashkov, he'll probably make you join your mother… Admit it Adrian, you are one of those rare breed. You have a heart."

"Then leave me to what I like doing, Little Dhampir. I feel filthy in the Court. I refuse to be around leeches."

He smiles sarcastically. "I believe in spreading the Lo-o-ve."

I try not to answer immediately. I let him think he is winning this argument.

"While you are spreading your love, what does your heart feel when you see the dead and dying?"

He frowns. "Rose, let us not ruin our night."

"Did you feel the love while holding the hands of your grieving buddies? Did you enjoy the company while you were drinking and everybody else wailing?"

"Not funny, Little Dhampir."

"Pardon me then… How many truckloads of medicine have you sent so far?"

I did not hear any answers so I ask again.  
"Just for this year, how many funerals have you attended? What's the total number of coffins you've donated, Lover Ivashkov?"

"I am leaving."

He stands up but I catch his arm and sit him down hard. He is a Moroi and I am a Guardian Dhampir so I'm much stronger than him though he is a lot taller.

"Have you ever known personally any of these slain Guardians? Have you ever compared how many were old enough, and how many have just had their first kiss? Furthermore, how many Morois also died because their guardians were too young?"

"What more do you want me to do? I am doing my best to help, Rose."

"You are thinking like a band-aid. You do not stop us from having wounds, you just cure them when they're there. A band-aid cannot even treat a gun wound!"

Adrian looks hurt. "Are you saying all those who are helping are useless?"

"Absolutely not. We all need to get together if we want the Moroi-Dhampir world get back to its feet instead of cowering in the corner. Coz that's what we are doing right now. All Moroi societies governed by these Monarchs in the Royal Court, be it in Russia or Turkey, are like mice colonies. We are hiding in our cellars since the Strigois are exterminating us. We are being treated like pests! Just think of the danger if the Humans become aware of us.

"And what do you want from me?" It is frustrating because he still doesn't get it.

"There are volunteers helping out the victims, there are Guardians and Morois devoting their time teaching our novices; but we only have Lissa and Tasha. They are the only two in the Monarchy brave enough to go against this group of leeches or panicked Royals. King Nikolai is ready to throw all breathing Dhampirs to the strigois just to appease his Court.

It's killing all of us, Adrian. And despite all of the efforts to prepare the novices and to save the dying, the Royals will drive us to extinction."

"How can we make them listen? We will just make a triumvirate against all of them."

But I can see his eyes glittering.

"A triumvirate with a manic lobbyist supporting them to start with.

An enraged lobbyist with tireless staff to compile facts and photos of actual deaths. We will blitzkrieg the Monarchs with protests of the existing 16year old Guardianship law and other abusive legislatives just to soothe their panicking hides.

Plus Adrian, while Court is adjourned, the triumvirate and the manic lobbyist will travel to gain more drinking buddies and sympathizers. We will probably need King Elvis to ensure a big crowd."

I stop to leave Adrian to his thoughts.

He points to the club where he performed. "King Elvis will perform to a much bigger crowd than that one?"

"With the crowd screaming louder than ever and bikinis thrown by the minute!"

"So when do we go back?"

"As soon as you're able to wrap things up here… Ahmm... Adrian, can you hook me up with one of your Elvis friends just for tonight? PLEASE?"


	5. What We Put On Our Plates

_It took me quite awhile to finish this. I had this chapter ready but there were important feedbacks that I realized I had to address in this chapter. It threw me off course, reason for the hiatus, but in the end I like this version than the previous one._

_I really appreciate feedbacks coz they help me with the development of the story, plus I know you're still out there. So it would be great to hear from you._

What We Put On Our Plates

My mind is running a mile a minute. I know it's not true, but I feel that the years spent in the academy were my years of denial, running away from my reality and responsibilities. Of course I was one of the key persons in St. Vladimir to setup the new curriculum for our sixteen-year-old -novices, but I still felt I was hiding behind the real issues. And I am not one to skirt around problems. Finally, I feel that those years of evasion has finally ceased and I am at least trying to gain back the driving wheel of my fate.

In my perverse sense of overblown self-worth, I hold myself guilty for not tackling the idiocy of the Court years back, all these hardships could have been avoided have I acted sooner. It's the classic Rosemary Hathaway self-lashing because I take it upon myself to carry the burdens of our world. I am aware that it's another form of _Saving the Strigoi Dimitri_. That did not work out exactly as I envisioned it, preparing our novices to be invulnerable to strigoi attacks is bound to fail, so challenging our Royal Court, and eventually changing our government set-up as my eventual goal, are within my realm of improbable missions.

Driving back, Adrian and I have decided that he would deal with his cousin regarding the Ivashkov spot in the Royal Court. Apparently, he and his cousin will have to wrestle privately within the family for the position. I have known Adrian for almost 8 years, and only now have I finally seen commitment etched on his face. I am glad to see fire in his eyes.

I, on the other hand, will apply at the Guardians' Headquarters for Adrian to be under my charge and start setting-up our office. My application to make him my charge will create a buzz since Adrian has been evading a personal Guardian for his security. How he is able to evade attacks is a study of great timing and smart evasion.

My stream of thoughts breaks when Adrian calls me from his car.

"Hell Rose, do you want to get back to Court in one piece or are you planning my going back as your final legacy? Coz the way you're driving seems like you're chasing Hades chariot, and am telling you, I will turn around and go to Las Vegas to start a bigger career there if you decide to crash your car."

When I check my speedometer I see that I am going over 110mph. I quickly lessen the pressure on my gas pedal. "Sorry Adrian, I guess my mind is not on the road." I confess to him sheepishly. "I am just thinking of all the next need tos. We need to set-up an office, link-up with Vasiliza and hopefully with Tasha, we need to buy computers and those hi-tech gizmos we'll need for communication, of course we have to hire staff and researchers and... Oh shit! I just alienated the young guardians. Adrian, we haven't even started and I made enemies out of possible supporters! Stupid!"

"Little Dhampir, you're going above your head again. There's time for all those things you mentioned. We're in this together now. I'm not the bystander financier anymore. As for the court guardians, that's just the usual Hathaway hard-ass introduction. They'll get the real you after awhile."

These words of confidence set me at ease for a while but I start getting jumpy again. "I just can't mess this up, Adrian. In the past I'll just do things on how it felt at the moment, I don't think much of the consequence. I caused Victor Dashkov's escape for crying out loud! He's still out there, planning god knows what. And now we're set out to do this, we're about to meddle into something that can affect people's lives. What the hell are we thinking? Maybe it is better to be your assistant in Las Vegas!" Everything seems overwhelming at the moment.

I hear him chuckling at the other end of the phone, "That's probably a good idea." As always, Adrian has something to say to calm me down. "Rose, you're no genie in the bottle. You don't have the answers to everyone's problems. But we do know things are chaotic right now, and you Rosemarie Hathaway will always try to set things in order. Do try to remember you are not alone in this. I'm sure those people who have always been around your crazy stunts will be joining you again; I am your newest recruit, finally joining the fray and won't be left behind. We'll do what we think is best, study all the angles, set things in motion in utmost care, then hope for the best."

Then he lowers his voice, growling like The King. " Of course, I'd love to rub those behinds, Rose Mareeyhh. It will definitely solve my own hard problems."

I snickered on the light flirting of Adrian. "You wish Elvis." It feels good that we can still have fun and make light of our situation. "Well, if there's really no turning back… Welcome to my world, Lord Ivashkov. Hold on tight coz we'll have the ride of our lives."

* * *

After submitting my application as Lord Adrian Ivashkov's Guardian, Adrian and I agreed to meet at the house of Lissa that evening. It is a Monday night (6am in human time) and I know Lissa is at home. She has been expecting me to go to her. While at Memphis I have gotten in touch with Lissa. I shared with her my decision on leaving school, my goal to convince Adrian to take the place of his father in the Royal Court, and plans of setting up an organized group for research, investigation and eventually challenging some of the legislation of the court.

After a long time, I reopened my bond and checked on how she feels. I felt uncertain on how she will welcome me in her world again. Rose, coming in strong and overprotective on helpless Lissa years ago, might now be distasteful to an independent and strong-minded Vasilisa Dragomir. Besides, politics is Lissa's realm and it never was mine. I have only been concerned in the past with politics when it threatened her safety, joining her and putting in my two cents worth might be overstepping some boundaries. It's a relief that I did not feel any discomfort coming from her. Her confidence in my ideas and decisions proves what she has been telling me ever since but in the back of my mind have somehow doubted; that she respects me and has always seen me as her equal. This confidence from my childhood friend propelled me to search for Adrian in earnest.

Lissa lives in the family house that belongs to the Dragomirs for over 10 generations. I've stayed there myself when I was a child and had wonderful memories while spending my vacation with Lissa and Andre. I remember the fruit trees by the courtyard and hanging flowering vines. Back then, I distinctly recall the house to be a magical place, with it's walls made of red bricks, casting warm reddish glow when the golden lights of lamps bounces back, and the Dragomirs with their pale pink skin, tall lithe bodies, golden yellow hair, glided gracefully when they move. They seemed more like elves and fairies, and Lissa was like a cute little pixie, skipping and prancing around, rather than the vampire Morois that they really were.

Buzzing on the front gate, I am surprised to see Olena Belikov, Dimitri's mother, opening the door for me. "Rose is that you?"

"Olena! I didn't know you're here. How are you? How's everyone? Are you alone visiting or are the others here?" I rush to her and embrace her tightly. I am babbling. I missed this beautiful person in front of me.

I met the Belikov family when I was 18, when I was hunting down the Strigoi Dimitri. In between what I thought was an honorable quest, I met and fell in love with this family.

"It's been so long, I missed you a lot, Dear." She says sadly.

I suddenly feel shy towards Olena. After all, she treated me then as the grieving widow of her Strigoi son. But after my break-up with the Russian arse, I was embarrassed because I felt like I jumped the gun when I assumed that role. And thinking of Olena, Yeva, and the others cut me deeply. I was stripped off of a loving family that I never had, with whom a widow-bride normally seek to for comfort. They in turn were torn between loyalty to a counterfeit daughter-in-law with whom they were indebted for their son's life, and love and support to their mentally and emotionally wrecked son. I didn't want to make it awkward for all of us. Thus, it was another reason why I ran back to St. Vladimir.

We walk towards the house, my left arm entwined to her right. "Are you with the others, Olena? How are they?"

"They are back in Baia. I brought Viktoria here to mend with Dimka after she got hurt with an encounter with a group of Strigois in Ontario."

"How is she? Was she hurt badly?" Although Viktoria and I did not part amicably the last time I left Siberia, she was the closest friend and sister I had in Baia and I feel extremely bothered to hear that she has been hurt.

"She had some fractures but her body has already healed. It's her heart that is still broken. Rose, the entire family under her charge plus the other guardians got killed. She was the head of security and she's saddled with guilt. But there were eight Strigois against three guardians. There were just too much to handle."

I barely got out my next question, fearing the obvious. "What were the ages of her fellow guardians?"

"At most 17. One just graduated, the other barely a year older."

"Just as I thought." I had to stop by the hallway and let Olena enter the room without me. I can feel my blood boiling again and I have to calm down before joining the others. After a few minutes, feeling myself more stable, I followed Olena.

By now I reach the dining area. First person I see is my former mentor. Not helping my current mood, I cannot stop feeling irritated since being called pigheaded and selfish is still quite fresh in my mind. Although wearing an apron and carrying a casserole to the table, he still manages to look magnetic and intimidating showing me that this is his domain and I am now an outsider.

Before I go inside I decide to humor myself by quickly texting Adrian to hurry up.

_Where are you now? Get your jelly legs here Elvis and don't forget to bring pasta. The Impossible Hulk is the chef. It might not take the Strigois to make tonight my last supper. _

_Impossible Hulk? _

_The Russian arse. You're getting slow, Ivashkov._

_Ha! Ha! Fitting. I never thought I'd see the day you'd use those words on the cradle robber. You used to say his name complete with blushes and drool._

_Was sick in the head then… Stop texting and get your ass in here!_

_On my way Little Dhampir! After my slugfest with Johnny Boy, can you please make sure I'll have some entertainment tonight?_

Before I get to answer, I hear steps going towards me. I look up and see a pissed-off Lissa.

"So, you took almost a week to show your face, gatecrash in our dinner party, then stay out here and make me wait for you again!"

"Oh Lissa, the gates are still intact. And I'm waiting for my food delivery so I can contribute to the party. Then I won't be crashing in." I give her the wettest puppy-look, a perfect mimic of my novices' faces.

She laughs aloud and asks excitedly, "So Adrian is here? You got to convince him to come back?"

I give her the thumbs up for the positive news. She was excited, almost giddy, on us doing things together and having me live so close by again once I become the guardian of Adrian. She tried to convince me to live with her, but I can't if I will be the guardian of someone else. Besides I am not even living at Adrian's house when we are in the Royal Court, I have grown accustomed to living independently on my own and the pad that Abe bought is perfect for the arrangement that I want.

Inside the dining area, there seems to be indeed a small gathering. Dimitri, Olena, Viktoria, Eddie, Tasha are there. So is a young, strikingly good-looking Dimitri look-alike young man. If I am not mistaken, it's little Paul all grown-up.

I decide to flirt. "Well hello there! Why do I feel I know you?" And I flash him a subdued version of my famous man-eater grin. Better not risk Olena revoking her welcome.

I am rewarded with a beautiful pinkish blush although he's trying to look nonchalant. "Because we have known each other way back, Guardian Rose Hathaway."

I look at the lad from head to foot to tease him. Puckering my lips I drawl,

"Tsk! Tsk! Definitely not intimately or I would have remembered you!" Hah! Got the boy! He's blushing beet red now. Yup! I still got it.

"Little Dhampir, I didn't know that aside from combat techniques, you also mastered cradle robbing when you were a novice." Delivery boy finally arrives.

I feel this intense stare at my back and true enough Dimitri is giving me one of his dark glares. Not wanting to be cowed, I announced in Hathaway flare. "I've always strived to follow the footsteps of my former mentor, Adrian."

"He's my nephew Roza. I thought you met all of them when you were in Baia."

"See Adrian, I even keep it all in the family!" Adrian sniggers and Dimitri leaves us with distaste on his face.

I whisper and wink at Paul, "I knew it was you, Paul!" The lad chuckles. "Are you a guardian now?"

"Yes and I am stationed at the Royal Court. I will hopefully be assigned to Jill once she graduates from St. Vladimir. Uncle Dimka promises to recommend me to guard Jill eventually." He says proudly. But he adds with a frown. "In the mean time, I have to continue training and settle with clerical jobs at the Royal Court's office."

"Hmmm… you must be good. You're uncle will not recommend you to that position if you don't deserve it."

Jill is the half sister of Lissa from her Dad's short-lived indiscretion with a performer in Vegas. For a while, the relationship between the two sisters struggled, but it finally strengthened and stabilized when Jill supported Lissa's bid for a seat in the court and consequently, her legislations. Being the other surviving Dragomir, once she graduates from the academy, Jill's guardianship will be discussed behind the corridors of the Royal Court and will be highly sought after by guardians.

"Good! Stay there until your uncle tells you you're ready." But I can see the impatience in the young Belikov's eyes so I added. "Don't be a fool and rush things just to prove yourself."

Then I give his uncle my half-assed smirk to show him Rosemarie Hathaway is not backing down. "We brought some dinner too Comrade Hulk, so you can't kick us out. We're not free-loading." He just lifts an eyebrow and nod.

Everyone then greets us and exchange news. I immediately head to Tasha.

"Tasha, how are you? Abe said you spent a few weeks in his place last summer."

"Oh yes. That was the same time Janine, Eddie and Lissa visited you at the Academy. We stayed at his vacation house in Turkey. I was with Christian, Mia, Dimka and Paul. Abe was very nice to free Pavel's schedule to act as our tour guide. We had a grand time."

"Well, I say! Are you pregnant?" I notice her slight bump only now.

"Almost four months." Her eyes are glittering and I've never seen Tasha so happy.

"Oh my God! That's great, Tasha."

Ever since I went back to the academy to teach and Tasha assumed an active role in the Royal Court, I have learned to enjoy her company. I go to her to give her a heartfelt embrace. I am so glad, she's one lady who deserves to be a mother. She's been taking care of Christian since he was little, and she has been dreaming of having her own family ever since I met her when I was 17.

"Whom am I supposed to congratulate with you? Is it the Hulk?" Motioning to Dimitri when she gives me a quizzical look. "Is he finally able to prove his worth?"

"Dimitri? Oh no, Rose. Like you, I got tired of waiting." She smiles teasingly.

"You know you have the better man, Tasha." Dimitri smiles warmly at his friend.

Tasha retorts, "And you're a lost cost, Dimka."

Ha! Ha! The night is turning out to be nice after all, it's bash the Russian arse night. "I'm so relieved for the child… Anyone I know then, or is it a secret for now?"

"You definitely know him, it's Pavel." Tasha is grinning and blushing like a schoolgirl. "Pavel is arranging with your Mom if they can exchange charges."

"That's great! I'm sure Baba will be open to the arrangement if Mom will agree…

So how's Christian?"

"He is helping me with the affairs in court. He might not be interested in showing himself but I go to him to discuss policies and current events. He is also running with Mia the gym for offense and defense for Morois. You really should come and visit. They are about to offer short courses for interested enrollees. They are also in touch with other Moroi instructors of other gyms to establish tournaments."

"That's good. If you need instructors I can arrange my schedule so I can pitch in to help. So it seems these classes are accepted nowadays?"

"It could be better. Definitely a lot of young men are interested, young women enrolment is increasing too, but for now it's more for the ego thing. Just a few are really taking it seriously as a means for offense and defense." Smiling sadly, Tasha grumbles. "I hate it that my kind are still acting like prima donnas without realizing that they are actually sitting ducks."

Tasha has always been a kindred spirit. "Baby steps, we'll get there.

"Lissa mentioned to me the day before that Adrian is bidding for his father's place in the Royal Court. Is that why he is back?" Tasha asks looking at me closely.

"Yes, he just came from the Ivashkov family meeting. He has informed them of his intentions, nothing solid yet but at least it's out there now. Everybody knows Adrian was the favorite nephew of our former Queen, and had a good chance of replacing her if he got serious in government."

"I take it you support this. After all, you did leave the academy and look for him to become his guardian."

I have to take my time answering Tasha. She does not really know Adrian personally, his reputation as a womanizer and drunkard does not merit confidence from her. She is closer to Dimitri and Adrian's strained relationship with my former mentor can affect her opinion.

"Tasha, he may not look it, but he is a good man. He was a spoiled fool who is now growing aware of his family's legacy and role in our society. Over the years that Lissa and I have known him, he has proven himself to be a loyal friend. He may not show it, but he has integrity and he has surprised us with his compassion. Don't let that irresponsible facade of his fool you, he just hates to look vulnerable. It took me some time too to appreciate his real worth. And the guy's got the name and charm to get those stiffies in court see your cause."

Wanting to lighten the mood, my brain suddenly starts whirling, remembering something. "Ooh! Janine with Abe, I can see the possibilities."

"My god, I can just imagine Guardian Hathaway batting eyelashes with Zmey the Snake!" Tasha going along with my change of topic.

"I wonder if they are into breaking bones while they're making out?"

Tasha and I are giggling. Imagining The Janine Hathaway and the notorious Ibrahim Mazur's possible sex life is sooo titillating. "I'll wonder who'll be on top?" This cause us to laugh so hard, causing belly aches and tears in our eyes.

"Is it possible for my Mom to still have another kid with Baba so she'll get off my back? That woman thinks I'm still a novice when she visited me the last time at St. Vladimir."

"Probably coz there's not much difference." I heard the Hulk mumbling.

I wink at Tasha and turn to Eddie who's behind me. "Hello Eddie, I received your messages but I was at Memphis."

"Well I've been looking for you. I heard you were here but you didn't show yourself."

"Well I don't blame you. It is definitely tiring to be with bland and morose company all the time!" I answer back loudly to make sure someone in particular hears me. " I know it's a lot nicer to be around me coz I try to keep it bright and fun, despite our jobs. Don't you agree, Castille?"

I then hug Eddie and pull him to a corner. The incident with the guardians is still bothering me. "Did you hear what happened to me in the headquarters? That was some mean bunch!"

"And you didn't make it any better by keeping it cool and introducing yourself nicely."

"Eddie, they took me by surprise. It was like being back in high school and being ganged up on."

"Rose, you're a former instructor, these guardians are just a bit older than your senior novices! Surely you could have handled it better… I am not excusing them either, they were rude to a colleague. But you have to understand, they somehow felt betrayed that a teacher has left her dhampir novices to guard a moroi. They resent it all the more when you mentioned you are Rose Hathaway."

"I don't get it. Surely I have the option to change course."

"Rose, you are recognized here as one of the best instructors. A lot of your graduates are known for being highly skilled and dedicated, and they have pointed to you as their driving force. Yours is not a career but a calling. Do understand, we dedicate our lives to the Morois, specially to the Royals. It is just fair that we hold the teachers answerable to the guardians. By leaving, you have indirectly endangered us as well as our charges."

It's feels like Eddie kicked me on the gut. _Here we go again!_ "That's too much to put on my plate Eddie."

"Probably, but it's true Rose. You can't deny this. A badly trained guardian is a hazard to his charges and colleagues. Schools are producing as much guardians as they can, but not enough instructors are available. Brilliant teachers like you are harder to find."

I can't help but interrupt hotly. "We have to produce more because there are more dead guardians. They are dying because they graduated extremely young. Don't put the responsibility on us, the Royals did this!"

"For whatever reason Rose, we still have to prepare our novices. That is your role! That should have been enough for you."

"Are we talking about the guardians back in the Royal Court, or are we talking about what the guardians believe in this house, Eddie?"

I feel numb when he doesn't look at me nor answer. Of all my long time friends and mentor, including Lissa, Christian and Dimitri, Eddie was the only one who would always help with my self-assigned quests rarely with questions. With him I feel total trust, this in itself strengthened my resolve to proceed. It crushes me that my childhood friend doesn't trust me now.

"Please don't make me regret my decision." I have to whisper so he won't hear it cracking-up. "My leaving was not a spur of the moment. This was a long and painful process… I have never had a normal home. The nearest that I can call home is St. Vladimir. Everybody there IS my family… It's been so different there these last few years, Eddie. I devoted my every waking hour to my kids, all of us did. We devoted our time to prepare them as best as we can. They are my children and I got to know my children so much. I know their dreams, their frustrations; I reached out to their families back home so I can understand and help them more. Still, a lot of them are lost. For us, graduating novices mean additional guardians to monitor and pray for. And yes Eddie, I learned to pray and go to mass for my children!"

I can see that Eddie is taken aback by the pain and grief he sees in my face. "I'm sorry, I did not mean to belittle your devotion. I think I understand now why you left. It was too draining."

I laugh bitterly. "If only it's that simple. I did not leave to escape. On the contrary!

I left to look for a solution for all these. Because I cannot bear seeing any of my family die. Damn it! No more! I'll be damned if I fail to make it better for them."

I look into his eyes, hoping he will understand and trust once more. After a while, Eddie gives me a sad smile.

"I admit I can't fully accept your reason behind all these. For now I cannot see what can be more noble than taking care of our young." He rushes on seeing my tears that threaten to spill.

"I've always respected you. You do things thoroughly and never leave them unfinished. You have an absolute belief in what you do and your heart is always involved. And these are all unselfishly done. Others might argue that you have done a lot of foolhardy things, but nobody can claim that you did them to serve yourself. You don't really do things for yourself, don't you Rose? And here you go again."

Eddie grows quiet, I see an internal debate raging. Finally he speaks up. "I know this is something I won't immediately understand, is potentially dangerous and most probably against the law. But as always, I'll be there with you. You have always had my trust and you have earned my respect, Rose."

What Eddie says strikes a certain chord in my heart. His words remind me that outside of the Academy's gates, I also have my family here. And it feels good.


	6. Choosing My Reality

_This chapter has been difficult to write. Viktoria fought me all the way, and Rose, for once, was tounge-tied. Only lately did they start cooperating, thus only now is this chapter updated. My apologies to those who are reading this for the long wait._

_Not really sure if our characters are true to the characters of Richelle Mead, but hers are still in their teens in her Vampire Academy series. I am borrowing her characters and plot, making them older... But in the end, I still cant call this as originally my own.  
_

_I do hope you will take the time to review. Would be glad to know your comments. It tells me if you are still out there. Reviews also spur the creative juice in me. _

Choice of Reality

After dinner, I go looking for Viktoria. I find her sitting alone at a dark corner of the courtyard. She looks downcast and uncaring of her surrounding.

"Hello Vika, I've been looking for you."

"Why?" Her voice dead.

"I just missed you. It's been awhile… So you were able to convince Yeva to let you be a guardian after all!"

She nods without looking at me.

"Can I look at your marks?"

Still not responding, she shows me the back of her neck by pulling down her collar. I am impressed. She has 11 molnija stars, 4 of them newly tattooed, and 2 battle-ax marks.

"Wow! It's a good thing Yeva changed her mind. You certainly are a Belikov."

Viktoria just shrugs. This one-way conversation is getting a bit tiring. I try again.

"Did you have a mentor? You were a bit late. When I met you then, you have not decided on being a guardian."

"Dimitri."

It figures. The Russian arse is a brilliant guardian and an excellent instructor. And with his sister having the same potential as his, he transformed her into an awesome guardian as well.

"So after this sabbatical, what are your plans?"

It's my subtle way of letting her know that I have heard of the massacre of the family under her charge.

"I will probably leave here and go back to Baia. I can probably become like my mother and have Belikov babies. My contribution to the Morois since I am a failure as a guardian." Viktoria answers in a deadpan.

I am not known for my patience, that is Lissa's department. This self-indulgence of self-pity is pathetic and a bit irritating. If I am not mistaken, this household has been catering to Vika's black moods for some time now. I want more fire from Viktoria. I would rather have the angry and screaming Vika I left at Baia than this empty shell. So I decide to gaude her by answering her brightly.

"But why do you have to go back to Baia for that? The Morois there are too parochial. You will produce country bumpkins. You might as well stay here. Adrian can introduce you to old rich and Royal Morois. You'll be able to produce excellent pedigree to the Belikov livestock."

"Screw you!" Finally I see anger and spirit, a sliver of the Viktoria of her teens.

"Uh-uh! It's not me who's having that, you are." I can be a real ass once I get into it.

"You arrogant bitch! You've always acted you are better than the rest of us. I bet you even believe that!" She whispers but her eyes are piercing and flaming.

"In a way, I do."

And I admit I mean this but not in the way she thinks.

"Well you're not! Eddie and definitely my brother, maybe even Paul, can kick your butt. And mind you Rosemarie Hathaway, I know a lot of guardians who may not be as good as you in combat but they will never leave their charges and obligations. That makes them way better than you!"

I just smile at her outburst. She is contradicting herself by giving up all that she has worked for and choose to have babies. Isn't that leaving your _obligations _too?...

Or does she seriously think that having babies is part of her obligation to the Morois?

"I wish our laws will let me use the name Mazur. That name completes me, Rosemarie Hathaway Mazur..."

Viktoria looks at me puzzled. Growing up, she has always seen my father as Zmey, the snake. Raising my Dad on an illustrious pedestal is way out of the ordinary.

"Hathaway represents devotion, sacrifice and selflessness. There's really nothing wrong with that name. But it's incomplete. It lacks an important essence of me. Mazur, on the other hand, means making choices, willingness to take risks. This assures me that I am a thinking person. And as long as I am willing to take the risk, I can have a choice on my reality. "

I feel buoyed, for once saying out proudly why I feel so connected to my father. There is definitely no shame in being the daughter of Abe Mazur.

"As a Mazur, I do not need to give a damn what others think if I decide to change my vocation. I can forge on even if there are a lot of people around me condemning my choice as plain selfishness or pigheadedness. I want to choose how to prove my devotion, my sacrifice, my selflessness without being dictated on how to do it... Our law only lets me be Rosemary Hathaway, but that does not stop me from being a Mazur."

I wonder if she understands what I'm saying? Is this reaching her?

"Vika, I do not claim to be the best guardian, nor am I the best person to be around with. I am however an alternative, I am another choice. I am there for those who are choosing to take risks for change. I am willing to get hurt and face censure and insults, if that will eventually lead us to a better circumstance for our loved ones. That makes me want to believe _I. Am. Better... We. Can . Be. Better."_

This time I can see a glint in her eyes, probably curiosity, hopefully understanding.

"Viktoria, your assignment from the very start was suicidal. The Age Law that the Court enacted is mass suicide for the dhampirs. Once your young subordinates start panicking, you were actually taking care of seven charges. One guardian against 8 strigois, that's next to impossible. Only guardians as experienced as my mother or your brother can probably pull it off, but it's asking too much from you."

Vika's life-long practice of putting the Morois first kicks in.

"But the Age Law was passed years ago, we have to abide by it and we have to do the best that we can as guardians. They come first Rose so our race will continue... Besides, if it's really suicidal, surely The Royal Court would have repealed it by now!..."

I am dumbstruck! Are my other colleagues just as blind as Viktoria? Do they honestly believe the Morois know what's best for us? By blindly sacrificing our lives, are we really helping our race?

I don't believe it and neither should my kind! We should not accept that we have to be the sacrificial lambs. Damn! I am losing my temper and I want to throttle Vika for being so blind.

"The majority members of the Royal Court are morons! They are a bunch of ignoramus fools who have never fought and thought all it takes to fight is strength and speed. They have never seen the bravado of a 6-foot 16year old turn into panic once faced with death. They don't know what it takes to keep your courage and presence of mind when all hell break loose."

Suddenly Viktoria is shaking. She is gasping for breath and her eyes reflect the terror of the massacre.

"I'm right aren't I, Vika? Your other guardians panicked, didn't they?"

She is looks at me terrified, guilt slicing her into pieces thinking that it was her fault she lost control of the situation.

"It's my fault! I didn't prepare them enough. My fault!" She chants again and again.

I want to give her strength, I also want to end her pain. But, like my other graduates who went through the same tragedy, she will relive this nightmare repeatedly. And she has to accept that nothing could have been done about the past. Only in what they make of their future will their pain hopefully dull into a bearable throb.

"They just lost it Rose! We were holding-up quite well at the start. They were actually following my directions. But when little Denny panicked and broke away from the group, everything fell apart. Mirabeth ran after him carrying Baby Jenna with her. Adam used his fire element on his guardian Seth so he can save his family. I thought Carol was safe with Gina but Gina was so scared, she was not even aware of the strigoi that struck from the back. Gina, the top guardian of her class, just froze and she was taken down by the strigoi without even a fight. I tried to gather them back but nobody was listening. They were all like headless chickens!"

She continues to rant and weep, pacing around the small space of the corner of the courtyard with her fists occasionally striking the walls or clawing her hair, searching for possible solutions she did not think of during the tragedy.

"I was able to kill 3 of the strigois, but the rest of them were able to subdue us. Except for the kids and Gina who were drained right away, they brought us with them."

I know there's something more that she has not told. I wait for her to continue.

"I haven't told anyone that by the end of the week they turned Seth and Adam into strigois, so they can replace their lost members. Aside from drinking from us, there was this beast using Carol repeatedly. He just enjoyed the torture! Carol and her mom eventually lost their minds and were drained before I escaped. My only consolation that before I escaped, I killed that son of a bitch who raped Carol and put to death both Seth and Adam!"

I am dumbstruck at the viciousness of the Strigois, I did not notice that I am staring blankly into space. I broke myself from stupor when I hear this keening sound coming from Viktoria. I rush to her side and envelope her with my embrace and let her pour out her fears, regrets and guilt, just as I used to do with my novices when they have nightmares during the night. We stay entwined until she calms down.

"Viktoria don't lose yourself in this, don't let this break you. Honor the family and comrades you lost by healing yourself and be a better guardian."

"I don't think I can. I will always see their faces, I can't forget how I failed them."

"Oh god, I see another Dimitri right in front of me. You're siblings alright."

I don't know why but I feel so bitter about this.

"Rose, I know my brother hurt you but his past shattered him. He's doing his best to continue living and keep his sanity, and if it meant that he had to sacrifice his relationship...to...to let go of..."

"I have gone past that Viktoria, there's no need to relive that again."

"I am just saying, that I understand why Dimka chose to live without you. It hurts too much to remember the past. I will go crazy if I will see all their faces every time I go out of these walls to protect the next family entrusted to me."

"But will this make you happy Viktoria?"

I wanted to ask too if Dimitri is happy after all these years of emotionally closing himself but I don't want to dwell on that. His happiness has not been my concern for a long time now.

"Running will not stop the nightmares, the guilt. It will dull to an ache but it can fester underneath. It will eventually catch-up Viktoria. You can't close your eyes when your children will be required to serve at 16."

Well, that shut her up.

"You don't even have to wait that long, you have nieces and nephews that will soon be in the same situation that you were in. Paul is lucky to have his uncle safely assign him in the Court, but how about the others?"

She doesn't even look at me in the eyes. She looks confused, her make believe cocoon crumbling.

" And when our numbers dwindle, are you willing to accept the Court's proposed law that obligates 18-22yr. old Dhampir women to produce children? Will you be looking on the sidelines while they make bitches out of our daughters?"

She gasps. Vika seems confused but once again angered. I can definitely work with anger.

"It's normal to feel guilt, but use your brains Vika and stop being melodramatic. It does not bring back the dead and it definitely will not stop the others from dying. If you consider having babies as another way of fulfilling our obligations to the Morois, you have added another ammunition to the Royal fools to pass another law degrading us. In the guise of preservation of race, you are agreeing to turn Baia into a kennel of bitches breeding guard dogs for the Morois' security. That will definitely turn us into blood whores, as a lot of them arrogantly call our mothers."

"What do you want from me?" I can hear the shame in Vika's voice.

"Well, for one thing, get angry! Instead of staring into space, how about ranting and show how furious you are? You lost your people and almost died because of other people's stupidity and bloated self importance! You think your moping in the corner will make their heart bleed?"

I suddenly remember the fuming young Viktoria, who was indignant when I took away her boyfriend. I miss that young and carefree girl, she was full of life and ready to take on the world.

"Heck girl, where's that Vika who almost took my head off when Zmey scared away her boyfriend at Baia?"

Well that earns me a reddening of her cheeks, and that blush lessened the years on her lovely face. She sheepishly answers back.

"You were a major pain in the ass that night. I had been planning for sometime to make it "The Day". You know how other girls dream of their wedding day? Well I'm a realist, so my _The Day_ was losing my cherry! And you, Rose twatswatter, ruined it!"

We both burst out laughing on the memory of that night. We talk about all her preparation for the big event, how excited she was on finally losing her hymen, as her friends condescendingly called her virginity. She was laughing when she recalls how she tried doing what her friends taught her, to keep on oozing with sex even while waiting for him to come back. She recounted the horror when he did not return and some sleaze bag came in and kicked her out of the room.

I am lauging so hard my sides hurt. "You should have seen that loser's face when Abe called him out. He was so scared I thought he was going to wet his pants! You, Viktoria Belikov, owe me for saving you from having kids who can't control their pee pees piss on their pants."

"Yeah, he was an asshole. That was quite brave of you doing that for me. A lot of my so-called friends in the club either are competing for the title "Whore of the Night" or too scared to be called a sourpuss. Honestly, I was already getting cold feet, but I just can't show the girls I was too chicken to go through with it. Thanks Rose."

I nudge her a bit. I am hopeful, I can feel Viktoria is on her way back.

"I really like you, you know. Even way back we understood each other. I had a feeling you were just forcing yourself then. Honestly, were I in your position, I would have forced myself too just to prove to all that I don't backdown. Our difference then was I had Vasilissa and friends like Eddie and Christian to pull me back and not push me off the cliff. So I decided to pull you back myself. I knew you'd get it eventually."

We become quiet for awhile, relieving the pitfalls of teen life is a good breather from the gut wrenching reality that we are faced today.

Vika turns to me and asks. "What would you have done if you were in my shoes this time?"

"Lose my cool. Definitely lose my cool." I laugh softly. "Just like you, I would blame myself; guilt fest 24/7. I'd grieve hard and loud, the whole works. Break things for extra points."

"Ah, I thought of that but I am sharing a room with my Mom. I have too little that I can call my own and I can't trash her things. Outside the room, Lisa and the others won't appreciate it either if I touch theirs. Thus, the staring into space. For extra points." Vika mildly banters and smile.

I continue, glad that Vika can make a joke out of her grieving.

"But eventually I'd get angry and ask what went wrong? What did I do wrong? I would ponder on that. Then if I can't find the answers to that either, I'd look at the bigger picture and look for faults and breakdown that lead to the deaths. Then I'd move on and look for solutions. When I put enough time analyzing the possible solutions, I'd choose several possible recourse...

Then I'd ignore them coz I'm afraid I am being my usual arrogant self. I'd sit on them for years, I'd continue living in my safe cocoon, reasoning I am contributing to the good of our society by just doing my job. Besides, there are others out there who must know better than me.

But the wound will fester and after years of looking away, all those deaths would be unbearably painful that I just have to act."

I hold Viktoria's hands and let her feel my own pain and guilt.

"I'm just fast forwarding for you what I went through when my novices started returning in boxes. It took me years to stop from hiding behind the university walls and my title as an instructor and teacher, before finally deciding to act on what I feel could be done."

"By being a guardian to Adrian?" Vika sarcastically asks. Obviously her point of view on Adrian is influenced by her brother.

I correct her assumptions and lay out some of my visions.

"By helping place another moroi in the Royal Court who sees the Dhampirs as people and not as shields from the Strigois. I have faith in Adrian that he will help Lisa and Tasha push for mandates that will give us real solutions even if it will be hard for the Morois at first...

By educating our fellow guardians and dhampirs on what can be. To start questioning and find out the real situation, to go look for other solutions.

Eventually, I am hoping we will help each other come up with laws that will give us equal opportunities on what we can be in our world. I am hoping we will not be limited to being guardians or baby-makers, or to jobs that are intended to serve the ones we protect...

I look forward to a time when Dhampirs will find the formula on how we can have babies with our own kind."

"Wow! You do dream a lot."

I scoff at her. "But I just do not dream! Day dreaming all day long without an accompanying action is lazyness. Starting the process and working to make them a reality differentiates idle castles in the skies from choices and goals... And I am hoping I can have friends who will help me with these."

I feel no need to push for more, I have planted the seed and it is enough for now. Vika has way too much to think on.

"Anyway, I hope that helps you get out of that dark cave you placed yourself in. How about joining the others, I don't want my best friend spewing fire again coz I hid in the corner with you. We'll talk again when you feel like it."

* * *

Viktoria and I join Olena in the kitchen after our time in the courtyard. It is nice to have her smiling and talking excitedly. Olena rushes to her daughter and embrace her. She gives me a warm kiss on the cheek and whispers a quick thank you. From afar, I see the two Belikov men surprise etched on their faces hearing Vika leading the conversation for a change. Both men immediately going to us, no doubt to celebrate a hush family reunion among themselves. I extricate myself from them, giving them the privacy to bond as a family. I feel a slight tug in my heart, remembering the warm family atmosphere back in Baia. Aside from Lissa's family, that far and unknown little town was the only other place that I felt what a family could be.

Whatever warm glow I am feeling is immediately snuffed out when I suddenly feel irritated.

Hmp! Sure enough the Hulk is at my case again, his intense stare trained towards my direction. Probably the bloke thinks I've been corrupting his little sister all the while we were alone outside the yard. Is it petty of me if I raised one of my eyebrows? Hey, I could have given him the finger but I've got more class than that.

But I am definitely feeling quite uncomfortable with him being around my space.

Really? I do? But why?...

Hah! I don't think so. I'm a grown woman and a former mentor will not make me feel queasy with a dumb stare.

But why are my cheeks feeling warm? Hell! Am I blushing?

Wait a minute! Rosemarie Hathaway doesn't blush...

Rushing back to the sitting room, I see Adrian having a conversation with my bestfriend. He is his usual flirty self, nothing out of the ordinary in that. Moving on to Lissa, she's …Hmmm…Odd, why is she fidgeting? I've never seen her fidget with Adrian before…There it is again. A flash of anger this time. She is trying so hard to look unaffected but it seems all her blood has rushed to her face.

What the heck is Ivashkov saying to Lissa to make her feel uneasy?

"Hello, what are you and Lissa discussing?"

"His nightclub act! Disgusting." Says Lissa with a look of disdain.

Adrian guffaws. "Basing on the keys and undies thrown by the ladies, there's nothing disgusting about it I assure you. Besides cousin, how can you find the moves of the King of Rock & Roll disgusting while you can spend your whole day with the louts of the Court?"

"They are a different kind of disgusting Adrian, and you're a different category altogether. Your description of your shaking pelvis and pumping hips just proves how low you've gone just to get your kicks."

"Don't say that, you sound like an old maid! Ask Rose. You were enjoying it, right Little Dhampir?"

"How do you know I was enjoying it and not making fun of it?" I challenged.

"Well I'm getting out of here!" Lissa stands and add before she leaves. "And you know Adrian, Rose does not enjoy vulgar shows like those either. Don't you Rose?"

Now how do I answer that? Hmmm…

Adrian mouths to me a _You Are Such A FAKE!_ then calls out to Lissa.

"Vasilisa, you really are being a prude. Haven't you been getting laid lately? Where is Christian, anyway?"

Everyone stops and look at Adrian incredulously, while Lissa pales and goes off to join the Belikovs.

I smack the back of the head of the fool beside me. "Way to go Mr. Sensitive! You just made an enemy out of an ally."

"It's not that bad Rose, I was just having fun with our sweet prim Princess."

I look at Adrian and I'm surprised because he seems not to have an inkling with what has been going on with our friends. He has always known what has been happening to me. Then I realize that Lissa is not me. The connection between the two has not been as strong as with me and them. I have to talk to King Elvis here and put some sense in him if this collaboration will ever work.

"Adrian, don't you know that Christian and Lissa have separated almost two years ago?

"They did? Why did Lissa break-up with him?"

"It was not Lissa. Christian called off their engagement. He got tired of living under the magnifying glass of politics and Lissa was pouring too much of her time in the Royal Courts. He told Lissa that he likes to live a quieter life."

"But that was stupid of Fire Boy, Lissa would always be part of the Court. She is suited for it. Vasilisa will always be the face of the Dragomirs in Court!"

"I agree."

"What Christian did is a form of betrayal to Lissa!"

"Not really, he was honest and cut himself off before they further hurt each other."

"But Vasilisa cannot do it all by herself. She needs someone with her."

"We are here."

"I mean love. She blooms when she is in love."

"She is not a flower, Adrian."

"But almost like one. She is not like you, Rose. You are a bamboo, exotic, flexible and tough. You only need to be watered then must be left out under the sun so you can sway with the wind and toughen out in the elements. Lissa is delicate; she has to be inside the nursery first to strengthen. Then when she's grown, she has to be watered, fertilized and talked to. She needs the attention, but it will be worth it because when she blooms, she will give fragrance, add color, and over-all create a big difference in a drab room."

"You are weird Ivashkov but I get you. And I hope you remember your gardening skills when you are with her. Do be more sensitive. As you said, Lissa is not me. Be more gentile, don't be too obscene."

But Adrian counters, "On the contrary Little Dhampir, vulgarity is exactly the fertilizer that your BFF needs. Didn't you see her blushing? It added more color to her formerly pale cheeks. It made her nose flare and her eyes flash. I bet she has not felt that tingle for awhile."

And he wiggles his eyebrows just to prove his point.


	7. Original Tramp

_I'm a lover, not a fighter. So I confess lifting from the books of Robert Ludlum, Christopher Paolini, RA Salvatore and Ninja Spirit of Shadow Warrior. Wikipedia as always has been a valuable quick source of information. Similarly, characters are from Vampire Academy Series of Richelle Mead. I can only claim my imagination and skills in plagiarism as my own for this chapter._

7. Original Tramp

I am too restless to sleep. My mind is whirling with all that transpired the night before. I had barely slept but I go out and ride my bike out of the Royal Court's ward very early in the morning, 3:30pm human time. When I find my surroundings too constricting, I shift to riding instead of running. I love the feel of the wind rushing through my face. The expanse of the landscape helps me breath, the speed in the change of scenery frees me… Whoosh! Whoosh! I need the space so my mind can go free and think of where our alliance can lead us. I wonder if they are willing to take it as far as I would. I have not talked to Tasha but I am confident she will be eager to join… Whoosh! Whoosh! I consider those who have yet to know. I fool myself if I think that my former mentor is of no importance. I can see that he has great influence on the younger guardians, as proven by Pissy-Kitty and her colleagues… Whoosh! Whoosh! I think of future enemies, both known and unknown, once we challenge the Moroi Royals. How dangerous can they be? I am not scared for myself, but how far am I willing to risk those around me?... Whoosh! Whoosh! But what scares me most is if I need to lose a part of my humanity, how much of myself do I need to give up just so I can say that all is well.

After my long ride, I get myself a quick bite then head for the guardians' gym. As agreed with Viktoria, we will meet there for our regular work out. The place is empty except for her. She is already finishing her run in the tracks and we do our stretches silently together. We then proceed to do some weights inside the gym. After a while, we look at each other and without speaking we go to the middle of the floor.

We start our posturing, walking in semi-circle to gauge each other. Based on the tattoos on her neck, I will not make the mistake to take her for granted. I intend to win this practice fight. My first reason, I want her to know that she can still learn from me; second, if she agrees to join us, there must be no doubt that she will be my subordinate.

Viktoria springs and goes near me to start engaging. I let her land some blows to test her strength and accuracy. Then I quickly change directions, successively throwing fast clean punches. I am interested to check her footwork. A flatfooted Guardian at the least, means loss of face to your fellow guardians, and at worse, loss of life during a strigoi attack.

I dodge her straight jab and, without warning, bull-rush her to drive back across the floor. Reacting fast, she slams her combined fists down on my back, almost driving me down on my knees. But almost off-balanced, she is not able to strike hard enough, so I am able to twist my upper torso to grasp her arms. Using Viktoria's own momentum against her, I pull her off her feet then quickly struck her in the kidney to bring her down. Vika ties her ankles around me, twisting, so that I fall backward. Immediately, she leaps to stand up. We grapple hand to hand. I can sense my training partner fighting with the strength and tenacity of the damned.

Guardians are by now starting to arrive for their daily training and the fierceness of the scene before them cannot be denied. The fight has turned into a serious combat. Her rage is palpable, her lips pulled back in a snarl. I will not undermine her by treating this like a usual work out. I attack lightning fast, throwing punches and kicks relentlessly without pulling back. I owe her a real fight, knowing she needs to prove to herself that she is not a mistake, that she is worth her promised mark.

When she strikes my right shoulder, my arm went numb. Viktoria is on me before I could shift my stance and protect myself. Three punches in succession sent me reeling and backing up. She is almost upon me, when I slammed my forehead hard into the bridge of her nose. Blood flows and Vika staggers backward.

I immediately move in and kick, but Viktoria absorbs it by partially deflecting it. Then she clamps her left arm against the side of my body, trapping my ankle in between. But I surprise her. Because instead of being thrown off balance, I rise up, kick with my right foot quickly following it with a hook, throwing her back against the wall. I see my opportunity and take it. I slam her with my left arm, with my right I strike as if plunging a stake through her breast down where her heart is.

"Dead!" I declare and the fight is over.

Suddenly somebody roughly pushes me off Viktoria. Still filled with adrenaline, I roll on my stomach and raise myself fast. I am about to strike back, when I see that it's Paul. He looks extremely angry and worried.

"Aunt Vika, are you hurt?"

I look at Viktoria closely, I see some bruises and a bloody nose. But aside from the bloody nose, I am sure she looks just like me, eyes fired up and exhilarated.

"Damn you Rose! Why do you have to rough her up that much? You winning over her don't mean shit coz she's been hurt. You want to prove you're a badass? Then fight me! I'm bigger and strong…."

Paul has not finished talking when I pivot clockwise. As I move past him, I suddenly straighten his shoulders, sending an open-hand slapping strike to his solar plexus. Now that I'm behind Paul, I use both my hands to secure a hold on his jacket and hair. Then I use the bottom of my foot to fold his knee in order to force him into submission. He falls hard on the floor when I finally let go, stunned.

"But with slow reflex." The voice of Instructor Hathaway emerges. "Do not insult your Aunt Vika because she can take you anytime. Size and strength do not complete a guardian."

"She's The BAD ASS, Paul! Rose has been kicking my butt since we were novices and it's no different last time we traded punches at the Academy."

Eddie shouts from the bleachers. The guardians who have only known me recently are now looking at me with a certain awe. Just for that, Eddie Castille is officially engraved on my BFF list. No magic erasers can take his name out.

A deeper voice adds. "Guardian Hathaway had beaten me during her field experience when she was just a novice, Paul. And I was her mentor."

Wow! Now I feel like bobbing my head, like one of those bubble-head dolls of NBA players.

I see him standing across the floor, surrounded by his adoring followers. Not surprisingly, pretty Kitty (but not pissy) is one of them. For the first time since I arrived, I give Dimitri a full smile... _Yeah, I know I mentioned his name. So what? I'm happy! Shoot me!_

"One of these days, I'll give you a chance to TRY to redeem yourself."

He laughs and counters. "We'll see Rose."

"You better be ready Comrade. We wouldn't want you to lose face with your groupies now, do we?" I wag my eyebrows, teasing him.

"Dream on Guardian Hathaway."

Hmmm... If I don't know any better, my former mentor sounds like his flirting. Well, somebody woke up at the right side of the bed.

"Guardian Hathaway!" I turn and see Vika standing, a sly smile on her face. "Everybody say you're one of the best instructor nowadays. In fact in the history, if we listen to your adoring graduates."

"Well I make them recite that litany at the break of dawn before breakfast." I cheekily say.

"Shut your trap Rose. Come on, walk the talk! So far I'm not really that impressed. I haven't fought for ages but I still got you good and hard a couple of times. So what gives, why do they call you one of the best?" Vika challenges.

Unlike my previous altercations with the Court Guardians, there's more of curiosity in Viktoria's expression than challenge. This makes me realize that these new guards have not really seen me in action. I too can point out that Eddie and Dimitri have not recently seen me in combat either. I've decided there is no better way to earn respect than the situation that Vika gifted me.

I look at each and every guardian's face in the gym. Not a single animosity etched on their faces. Every single body there waiting to be enlightened... I get to my gym bag, equip myself with fighting tools discreetly... then let Instructor Hathaway take the floor.

"If you expect to see one of the best guardians to show you her moves, then you might as well go back to the office coz my mother might be there. I have my fair share of Strigoi fights and wars, much more than the young ones here, but not as much and as epic compared to Janine Hathaway."

I see Eddie and Dimitri nodding their agreement to my show of respect to my mother.

"I do however can claim to be knowledgeable in the different styles of fighting. A few of them I am an avid practitioner. What does this mean for my novices?"

I look around for answers.

"A hodgepodge of fighting styles?" One of the guardians good-naturedly answers. A rumble of friendly laughter erupts.

"Well if you want to be the next Jackie Chan we can go over the whole bunch of fighting." I am smiling with them for a change. I am pinching myself secretly to make sure I didn't have a concussion while fighting with Vika.

"I studied under several masters and invite those who can share their skills to teach at St. Vladimir. I realize not everybody can fight like me. Obviously Paul is not me." I chide at the young Belikov earning me a roll of his eyes. "He's got the size and strength. I've got the speed and agility."

"And ass!" Some snarky guardian chimes in but shuts up when Dimitri frowns at him. Nobody tries to laugh after seeing their senior vexed.

"True, that too. I sure got the ass!" Teasingly, I turn to show my butt for emphasis.

The group laughs and some boys whistle, dissipating the seriousness in the air. Eddie and Dimitri shake their heads, apparently in disbelief that ole Rosemarie Hathaway of seven years ago is very much alive and teaching? These two obviously do not know how to maintain attention from a group of sassy, easily diverted hormonal teens.

"And I use it to my advantage! I can drop on my butt and roll out of enemy's way." And I do just that, drop on my butt, do a reverse roll while kicking an imaginary enemy with my right foot, then punch on another enemy at the same time I am jumping right side-up.

"Oooh that's smooth!" Surprisingly it is pretty Kitty who says it.

"It's a matter of studying your body, accepting it, feeling comfortable with it, then strengthening and sharpening your body, wit and heart. Do not ever forget to sharpen your brains because your body will only follow what your brain tells you, and your heart pushes you to act even if your companions are already too chicken shit to move. That's the most important lesson I barrage my novices, just what my past mentor etched on this granite head of mine."

And I wink at a smiling Eddie. I am willing to start over again with this group by acknowledging their senior officer, and hopefully they'll see beyond my badass reputation.

While the guardians are patting the shoulder of Dimitri, I notice the arrival of Tanya, Christian and Mia. I nod to acknowledge their presence but otherwise continue with my impromptu lecture.

"But that's not exactly fighting styles, right? I needed to arm my kids more to compensate their weaknesses or make use of their strengths."

And quick as a flash I throw three silver shurikens consecutively at the mannequin beside Viktoria. The guards jump back in surprise, except for Dimitri, Eddie and Vika. I am extremely please with what I observe on Viktoria. She coolly observes the 2 shurikens impaled on the forehead and the 3rd on the throat of the mannequin. She picks them off and returns them to me nonchalantly.

"These will not kill Strigois but will definitely buy you precious seconds... However..." I spin and throw a tomahawk at a wooden pole ten feet away from me, hacking the top portion off it's body. "Hopefully this will."

I look over to Tasha and company, satisfied that I am filling their minds with new possibilities.

"Of course you cannot go around carrying an ax when entering the numerous shopping malls our wards love going to. I have to go through with it with my shopping-addicted BFF when I was still guarding her."

Everybody laughs with a wince, remembering how our patience is tested every time we have to accompany our Morois on a shopping frenzy nightmare.

"But it's specially helpful out in the open." I pick up the ax on the floor and start showing basic attacks, spinning, slicing and parrying coordinating my body with the weapon while continuing my speech.

"An Indian Dhampir friend taught me and my students how the tomahawk can even be used as an extension of our arm. Quite helpful to keep the Strigois from closing in on us, where a lot of us are at a disadvantage because they are stronger. This axe is specially lethal when used by big brawny arms."

I stop and turn over the axe to Paul and the others beside him to try it out.

Then I lick my lips, pout them with a smile, and lower my voice with a slight purr...

"But my personal favorite, my own purr-sonal protection, something that I do not usually want to do without _(uh-huh! I'm not above using innuendos when I teach my senior classes, and this is no different.) ... _while I'm guarding..."

I pause for drama, hoping they salivate on what's coming next. I walk back to my bag, chin-up, chest out, a slight sway on my hips, fully aware of my captivated audience... Adrian might have forgotten but I am the original tramp in our group. Since mid-school I've had strings of boys hyperventilating while I pass and I needed no Elvis moves either, and I am still going strong as ever. Pure talent baby!

Retrieving from the bag one half of my dynamic duo, I exhibit my treasured sword. Taking it out from it's scabbard, the silver blade I proudly show the blade of my armor, .

"2 swords that the samurai treasured were the Katana and the Wakizashi. The wakizashi was, essentially, a shorter katana that could be wielded with one hand. Easier to camouflage, easier to wield even in enclosed spaces, I prefer the 24 foot blade of the little sister than the 40 foot blade of Katana. I pair this with our ubiquitous silver stake. Not only can this keep the Strigois at a distance, but many a times I was able to shorten the fight with them by catching their neck with this other half of my dynamic duo."

I ask for volunteers while I retrieve from my gym bag wooden replicas of my 2 silver babies. There's a bit of hesitancy among the group. It took some time before pretty Kitty, Paul, and another male guardian stand up. Well I feel flattered, if I say so myself. These guardians are not afraid to face Strigois but are wary to have a fight demonstration with me.

"Eddie! Chicken much?" I challenge while the others hoot.

My former classmate did not disappoint by immediately jumping on his feet. We all agree on using protective gears, even on the head, to avoid unnecessarily injuring ourselves. They too opt to use some sort of weapons with them.

I return the wooden sword in its scabbard and hang it securely at my back. My practice wooden stake I keep inside my holster by the right side of my hips. I stand in the middle of the floor, waiting for my "attackers".

I notice movement at the edge of my vision and sure enough, three shurikens fly toward my direction. I roll out diagonally to the left but I need not have moved for whoever threw it missed badly. I guess this is to be expected since none of my fellow combatants have practiced with such weapons.

Coming up from the roll, I set my feet and square myself to a charging guardian, aware also that two others are coming over at either side of the floor.

Still not taking out any of my weapons from their sheath, I charge ahead to my attacker to catch him off-guard, ducking the swipe of his wooden sword at the last possible instant, then came up hard behind the swishing blade, one hand catching the attacker's chin, the other snapping behind his shoulder. A twist and turn flips him on the ground while pulling out my practice stake and punching his shielded breast, putting him out of commission.

I then leap away, not wanting to get my feet tangled as two others charge in, one straight ahead, the other from behind. Out flash my sword, twirling and slicing the air keeping my attackers at bay. They easily step back out of my reach.

This time I initiate the fight. In a single bound, I cross the distance between pretty Kitty and me, my adversary at the back. Barraging pretty Kitty with a series of blows to push her back, separating us from her allies, but once in awhile I spin to protect my back from the others. I am nicely surprised with the agility of pretty Kitty she seems a natural with the sword, able to hold off my attack. But since I am faster than her, I am able to find my opening, slash my sword on her shoulders, knocking her out. Had it been a real Strigoi I would have aimed at the neck, slicing his head off. Since this is a practice fight, I can only hit at the shoulder to knock her out and have to thrust my stake to take her out of the combat. An extra step, but it still did not take that long to accomplish.

No rest for me though, I have two more to take down. I see at the edge of my vision a mannequin hurtling towards me. I roll away, but poor Kitty got hit with it since she is not allowed to move anymore. Good thing she's wearing protection on her face and body, lessening the impact. However, whoever threw the mannequin will be in big trouble later coz I hear her growl.

One thing I like about the wakizashi sword is its length. Since it's not too long for my height, I can still do my tumbles and rolls without it hindering my movement and speed, but it gives me the extra reach to attack and defend. My two remaining combatants, I think Eddie and Paul attack at the same time. I pivot and slash, then turn back to the other side to lunge at the other assailant, keeping them both at bay. They weave in and out, trying to look for an opening.

Eddie, I think, jumps and tries to kick low towards my legs. I evade him by jumping a slanted aerial cartwheel following it up with a roundhouse mid-kick catching him by his chin. Oooh! That must have hurt coz it throws Eddie hard on the floor. Have to say sorry for that later.

For now there's no time as Paul bull rush me, seeing his chance. But I am ready and definitely quicker than him. I meet him head-on. Using his momentum, I grab his arms and somersault with him backwards. He ends up on his back and I on top of him. I almost laugh when his eyes pops out with surprise, instead I throw a quick jab on his face, and with my left hand I punch the stake on his armored chest.

One more to go.

Eddie is now standing but I am not giving him a chance to recoup. I rain on him scores of heavy blows with my sword. Eddie cannot go pass my bladed arm. He's definitely fast, still there's really nothing for him to do but to dodge and kick. Finally, I catch him off-guard when I jump and spin-back delivering a hook kick catching him from behind, then I strike the falling Eddie with my sword. When he's flat on his back, I lightly tap his neck with my wooden sword.

The floor erupts to hoots and cheers. Everyone is generous with complements.

I extend my hand to Eddie to help him stand, I can't help but tease my friend. "That's 6 to 3 now Eddie. You got to have more practice fights with Belikov or you'd never be able to catch-up with me."

"Are you kidding me? I took it easy on you Rose, how else will I make you look good with this crowd." Eddie shots back snarkily.

Looking back at the other guardians, I see Dimitri clapping, his eyes glinting, smiling widely and patting the backs of those who joined the fight demonstration. I wonder if I'll get a pat too. _Good job Roza! (pat. pat) Good girl! _ Naah, no thanks… He's now checking on Paul and Kitty for injuries. Worried much, huh!

"Belikov! Belikov! Belikov!" The guards start chanting. Pushing Dimitri to fight me. Are they kidding me? Do they really think I'm Wonder Woman? I just had 2 practice fights including the one with Victoria, I'm bushed.

"Hey, I don't think it's fair for Guardian Belikov to win over a tired opponent."

"At least you'll have your excuse for getting beaten Guardian Hathaway." He growls but his eyes are smiling.

Leaving the guardians behind, I head to Tanya, Christian and Mia.

"That was awesome Rose!" Mia runs to me and gives me a big hug.

"Think you can offer a couple of classes on weaponry for your students, Fire Crotch?"

Christian laughs and brushes off my childhood nickname for him. He is excited with what he saw and we discuss on its possibilities. We agree to meet up within the week to discuss further on this before they leave the gym. Like them, I am a staunch supporter of arming the Morois with fighting skills. Not only am I alarmed with the deteriorating human rights of the Dhampirs, but I also worry of the constant danger of the Morois are in because of their helplessness from the Strigois. After all, a good chunk of my friends are Morois.

Rejoining my fellow guardians is fun this time. There are a lot of back pats, hero-worshipping (hah! I wish…), inquiries on using certain weapons, even the identity of who I will be guarding. I notice they started calling me Rose and Guardian Hathaway with more respect. I also promised to spend time to teach them basic weaponry. I came in this morning with a lot of worries in my heart, but I am going out of this gym with my steps a lot lighter and my heart singing.

"Guardian Hathaway!" Viktoria calls. She is excited and her eyes are dancing.

"You got me. I may not know all the details yet but I'm trusting you. And I think I understand. So whatever crazy plans you and Ivashkov have up your sleeves I'm in! I accept to be one of the guardians of that Royal Floozy if the offer still stands."

I nod and wink at her. It's definitely a great day, full of promises not only for today but also for our campaign. Adrian will be delighted to learn that King Elvis now has two bootylicious Guardians. He better kick Johnny Boy's ass soon.

While I am leaving the gym, I hear somebody's footsteps in the hallway.

"Guardian Hathaway!"

I see Dimitri Belikov walking towards me.

"That was incredible skills you've shown there, it's really impressive."

"Thank you. It's nice to know that my mentor approves."

"Dazzled. Highly." He corrects.

I smile and we grow silent.

Watching him closely, he seems to be barely holding his emotions, his chest heaving and his eyes glassy. There seems to be an ongoing battle inside him. Then probably making a decision, he reaches and embraces me hard. Oh wow! This seems so out of character of the Russian, err Dimitri. _Starting over Rosemarie_, I remind myself.

"How could I ever thank you, Roza? It's been very difficult for us. I see Mama losing sleep, worried sick of Vika. I felt useless, I didn't know what to do. She was barely talking and been keeping to herself. It was only recently that she let Eddie bring her to the gym."

"I know Comrade, believe me I know how it is." patting his back.

"I don't know what you told her but it worked! She's living again, full of plans, whistling this morning. Laughing. It's been a long time." He is babbling.

I feel happy. Really I do. Whatever issues in the past and present are being swept away. It's nice to resume our original relationship. Because before the romantic love aspect screwed it up for us, my former mentor was my confidante. There were certain issues that I can only discuss with Dimitri Belikov and not with Lissa.

…But wrapped in the Russian's arms, I am remembering something else. Memories dead, deeply buried because I didn't feel any use for it, are stirring. I remember extreme anguish, keening endlessly for my dead _husband_. My mind shifts again and reminds me of feeling numb and… Then I slam it shut and shovels back fast whatever else is trying to get out of my pit!

I free myself gently but firmly extricating myself from him. I put a distance between us. It's a waste of time resurrecting the dead. I am whole and complete.

"Viktoria will be fine. I bet she's challenging Paul in there, teaching her nephew a lesson."

I can see him studying me closely, wheels turning in that sharp brain of his, but finally deciding to let it drop by nodding his head quietly. He gives me a smile, one that can charm his way not only to Kitty but to the other guardians as well.

"She's there teaching an eager Yvette how to kick my nephew's ass."

"Yvette?"

"The young brunette, the one you were ready to knock senseless in front of the Guardians' headquarters."

"Oh! The hissing Pussy!"

He raises an eyebrow but decides not to question on my chosen nickname. "Yes, her. She and Paul have been kind of close, and I guess she likes to lay him flat on his back once in awhile."

I did not say anything but he sees that there's something dancing in my mischievous imagination.

He lowers his towering frame so he can look directly to my eyes.

"What?"

"I didn't say anything."

Why is this man getting nearer? Any closer and he will be invading my personal space.

"That look in your eyes negates whatever your lips are saying." He says softly.

"Well…" I snort, "…there's just this devilish idea that cropped up the last time... It's soo foolish. You don't have to know."

"I think I know but I want to hear it straight from the ass' mouth"

Ouch! "Well Kitty was defending you so much… You and Yvette seems…"

That shakes him up. Good ole cradle snatching issue will get this gorilla out of my personal space.

"She just turned 18, Rose."

"Ooops, sorry! I thought you have a certain fetish for girls under 20?" I am giggling. Ugh! It is a girly-girl giggle that is high and nervous.

"God! I can see Adrian's influence inside that brain."

Well, I'm feeling embarrassed to say the least. The man is justifiably fuming.

"For the information of your malicious brains, Eddie and I have been giving further training to Yvette and the other guardians. We felt there are a lot not suitably prepared because of the age law. And anybody willing to join, whether they're under 20 or over…"

"I get it! I do! And I promise to throttle Adrian if he ever refers to it." Crossing my heart just to appease Dimitri who is closely resembling the Impossible Hulk again.

"See to it please." His voice low and growling...

"You got my word, Comrade."

And I turn to leave before he himself acts on what I promise to do to Adrian… to me. Eeep!

"Roza!" He barks. I turn and smile, still in my _let's be friends_ stance.

"You know very well what my type is, and it's _NOT _Kitty. And for your information, most recently, I definitely go for women no younger than 24." His voice is throaty and sensuous, his Russian accent stimulating raunchy imaginations. Provoking some hunger within me, it seems like my fun time with Adrian's sexy _Elvis _friend happened ages ago. I feel like growling.

Instead, I rolled my eyes and gave him a finger. Childish, I know but I'm now extremely irritated. That flirting he just did, does he want to have a one-night stand or something? That's insulting and disrespecting me!

Because there will always be a sore spot between him and me. This freakin' guy have never acknowledged my major role in his present Dhampir state. Not even a peep of thanks. _Lissa had done it all!_ I have always wondered why he thinks that it's degrading to acknowledge that a junior(?), an air-head(?), a blood whore(?) saved him. But now I'm good enough for a roll in the hay? …But that's the past. As a friend-with-benefits though, he will never be.

I slam the door, muting the laughter coming from the buffoon!

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_Tomahawk - a type of axe native to North America, traditionally resembling a hatchet with a straight haft_

_Shuriken - a traditional Japanese concealed weapon that was generally used for throwing, and sometimes stabbing or slashing; commonly known in the West as "throwing stars", "ninja stars"they are mainly used as a supplemental weapon to the more used swords_

_Katana sword - commonly referred to as a "samurai sword"; it has historically been associated with the samurai of feudal Japan, and has become renowned for its sharpness and cutting ability. Katana __**blades**__ tended to be between 70 to 73 cm (27.6 to 28.7 in) in length, and long grip to accommodate two hands_

_Wakizashi sword - a traditional Japanese sword with a shōtō blade between 30 and 60 cm (12 and 24 in); it is essentially, a shorter katana that could be wielded with one hand. One of the main uses of the wakizashi was to fight indoors, where the low ceilings of feudal Japan would make use of the long katana nearly impossible._

_AN: Over 5000 words…(shudder)… Hope this makes up for the long wait... Hope this doesn't put you to snooze either… How about some reviews now? I won't mind it if you lift them from some book. =p But it would be great if it's not just "Update pls!" or "Update already woman!" Haha! Kidding. Such enthusiasm tickles my fancy too. _


	8. 50Year Old Mentor

_I'm back. Thanks so much for your reviews. Got excited with the comments; I even got included in a C2. Dang! These somehow spurred me to write faster. And believe me this is fast coz I had to do this chapter from scratch and re-edit 3x...probably 8…or more._

_This chapter is quite wordy but the story needs it. Rose tried to break the monotony with her side comments, so I hope you won't fall asleep. _

_Thesaurus is my writing buddy, so blame It for the snooty words. And Richelle Mead is still the Sensei. Which means all original plots and characters belong to her. I just attempt to further her feat…. but I'm not worthy._

8. 50 Year Old Mentor

Almost a month passed since my much talked-about demonstration in the gym. My relationship with the guardians has remarkably improved. I have joined Eddie and Dimitri to further train the younger guardians, specifically on the usage of weaponry.

Meanwhile my application as Adrian's guardian has been approved. Not yet a member of the Royal Court though, he is not eligible for two guardians. Viktoria is still on official sabbatical so the pressure of having a Moroi to guard is at least not a worry. Her time though is full as we have been setting-up the office and establishing communications outside the Royal Court.

The openness and flexibility of the youth never cease to amaze me. Huh! I'm talking like a 50-something granny, while I'm only about to turn a quarter of a century. Fine, it's 25 years old, I just want to sound snooty. Coz Paul, Yvette aka Pretty Kitty and her friends, who just a month ago were ready to kick my ass back to St. Vladimir, have been cockily handing over my ass some other way... Naaah, I'm just kidding. They have been wonderful. They are sharing their free time and talents to help us with our headquarters. Surprisingly we have their full support on our plans of investigating facts behind Strigois encounters.

Cosseted inside the Royal Court, the devastating news of numerous Guardians and their Morois charges dying have been buffered by the government's propaganda of putting emphasis only on successful Guardians-over-Strigois collisions. If not for the horrific experience that Vika went through, I will not be surprised if they would have seriously doubted the truth of the facts that I shared with them that occur almost regularly outside the walls of the Court.

If I am introducing new realities to Paul, Yvette and company, I am definitely learning a lot from them on the wonders of technology; it's dizzying, crazy and astounding. I maybe only seven years older or less compared to this group, but I have devoted my time in mastering the arts of combat and neglected to learn the modern gizmos. It is embarrassing to admit that I have only used the computer as a glorified typewriter and filing cabinet. It is the highlight of their day when they get to forbid me from using the computer. Hmp! As if I have any desire of doing so... _Ugh! I do sound like a 50-year old granny. I just bet there are a good number of 50 year olds out there ready to smack my head by comparing myself to them_.

In no time, this group put-up a data base of connections and informants, a file of open cases on missing Dhampirs and Morois, a file on actual Guardian-Strigois collisions, and even effects of new legislatures on the lives of Morois and Dhampirs outside this city walls. They have downloaded photos, news clips, outsider reports and saved them in different hard drives with passwords that are a bitch to crack. _Paul's words that earned him a smack from the head from his Aunt_. I just let them, it's all so James Bond-ish.

They requested and installed softwares, printers, scanners, flash drives, digital cameras, wi-fi and fast internet service for faster connections. And I can still hear Yvette when she declared, _"Of course laptops and cellphones are prerequisites of a well-oiled organization so it's not even a question of approval, but a question of how many. Hmp." _ Someone even dared to ask, James, I think, _"How about sucking it up some more with Daddy for a satellite?"_ The nerve of these geeks! But hey, I sound just like them when I say their shopping list. No nosebleed either. Totally Awesome, Dude.

But they are still going way over my head when they discuss on using announcements, posters, blogging, facebook, twitter and viral broadcasting. _Virus In A What? _ I was so confused and alarmed. They then explained to me in loud slow voices that these are new forms of social networking_(?) _to spread our news fast and wide spread. Of course that's after laughing at my face for a good 10 minutes... _"Braggarts, cocky sons-and-daughters of your mothers!"_ That time I can't help but grumble. Which earned me another round of laughter that I have to leave the room.

I can't complain though, in fact I let them see my weaknesses. It makes me a real person and easier to reach for them. I want them to know that I am just as willing to learn. And the headquarters is always buzzing with energy. Vika and I have to repeatedly pull them back from their enthusiasm. We don't want this office of ours prematurely closed by the authorities by making the Morois Rulers defensive.

Whatever personal and working dynamics I have established with Paul, Yvette and their friends, from being sort of a pariah weeks back, I am elated to have been accepted and most importantly, deferred to as one of their mentors. Through our time together, they are also learning to challenge ideas that have been perceived as society's creed and to think critically for themselves...

If ever Paul's uncle has anything to say about my influence on this young ones, I am at least still blissfully unaware about it. I have not heard anything from Dimitri on his opinion regarding their time spent in our headquarters and most specially my discussions with Paul and his friends, nor am I in a hurry to hear about it. There is wisdom in learning to choose your battles, or at least delaying them.

With the headquarters being set-up in a faster pace than expected, thanks to the young guardians, funds of Adrian, a bit from Lissa, and majority from Abe _(What can I say? I am now a bona fide Daddy's girl!)._ I'm eagerly awaiting for my charge Adrian Ivashkov to gain his sit in the Royal Court.

Getting together with Adrian have been at a minimum ever since we came back from Memphis. Aside from the supper at Lissa's family house, he was spending most of his time taking back the lost seat of his father at the Royal Court from his cousin. In my opinion, during the few times I get to watch him, he was dazzling. He was eloquent and can definitely hold his own candle against the orator Lord Ivashkov.

Poor foolish Johnny Boy. Lord John Edward Ivashkov was blindsided by the wanton and rakish reputation of his cousin, that he did not take the threat that Adrian pose seriously. Johnny Boy failed to see that behind the charm, wit and humor, there's a sense of duty, tenacity and intelligence deeply buried in the make-up of his cousin. I learn that few can stir Adrian, but once he sense that his moral code gets trampled and insulted, he becomes a fierce and very cunning opponent. Few recognize this but the former Queen Tatiana definitely saw it in her favorite nephew. And Adrian was not a favorite of the dead queen for nothing. His time with his aunt was spent discussing laws, politics in the Royal Court and the personalities of those involved. Adrian rarely shows it, but he has an in-depth knowledge of those who are in power and those who are behind them.

And today is The Day. Adrian will formally present himself to the ruling body of the Morois-Dhampir society. He has finally wrestled the majority of support from the Ivashkov clan. He has successfully convinced his family, that under the representation of John Edward Ivashkov, the clan has been relegated at the sidelines.

I was there when he rallied his cousins and aunts and uncles to move out of the gloom that they dumped their family in. After taking the safer route of quietly agreeing with the majority of the Court, to lessen the heat of the scandal caused by an Ivashkov member with her involvement in the murder of Queen Tatiana, Adrian convinced them that it's time to once again be at the forefront of the action. The Ivashkovs, he reminded them, have always been major players in politics even before his father and Queen Tatiana. The Ivashkovs, along with the Dragomirs, were one of the pioneers who united the Morois and Dhampirs all over the globe into one strong united society.

I never knew that; only then did I realize how important and revered these two clans are. Now I understand why we have to protect and treasure the only two living Dragomirs. In the bloodline of Vasilissa and Jill run not only a great noble family, but our society's glorious history as well. It took my breath away learning how much we owe them our existence. Because even if our society is in shambles right now, the intention of our forefathers were pure. Every Moroi and Dhampir know how essential it is that we live united so we can live on. If we did not, our bloodlines would have been long mixed with the humans and our kind would have died out. Extinct. It is our generation who screwed up the dynamics of the Moroi-Dhampir co-existence, by our hysteria over the Strigois and the arrogance of some that they think they are more superior.

I remember feeling that maybe it is Adrian's destiny to go back and help straighten out the mess in the Court. And I, Rosemary Hathaway, with the tainted bloodline of a Mazur, dragged him back to face his destiny! _Well done spawn of the Snake and Bloodwhore Warrior, you did your Papa and Mama proud! (Clap! Clap! Clap!... I love cheering me on.) _ How Adrian was able to veer away from the issue that it is his own mother who was involved with the murder just proves the brilliance of my charge. Sly sly man and I am proud of him.

So today, I am in my official Guardian black suit and waiting for my Moroi to meet his destiny. As a respectable Moroi Royalty, he has to show up in this important gathering with his Guardian...if he will ever come out of his room. I have been gathering dust here for over an hour and he's still inside primping whatever body part that needs to be primped. I have been befriended by 3 spiders, begging me to let them build their cobwebs at the back of my neck. I had to politely decline and promise to think about it, lest I want to be bitten. But I dare not complain. Adrian threatened that if I make him hurry he will come out in his white and purple Memphis-bound-for-Vegas costume. In view of that threat, you will definitely not hear a pip from me coz I do not want King Elvis to appear in the Court.

Finally! The door of his room opens. At la-aaahh...Oh my! ...My!... Huh!

"Cat got your tongue, Rose? You eyefuck me any longer, I just might blush Little Dhampir."

That got me out from the haze. "Arrogant bastard. Eyefuck my ass!" I snark back.

"I would have but that mannish suit of yours does not encourage voyeurism," Mr. GQ wince. The guy just have to rub it in my face!

"And that, Ivashkov, is the reason why I will never admit that you are giving Beckham a run for his money. It's unfair that I am forced to wear this penguin suit while you spent the entire morning putting on your eyeliner, blow drying those locks, and dressing-up in, what's that... a Tom Ford?"

I act as nonchalant as possible, but Fuck! I try not to use the F-word but this is one occasion that gives merit to this word... My Moroi looks delectable, scrumptious, appetizing. Wooh! I am salivating! The man definitely knows how to clean up. He's wearing a streamlined, dark charcoal gray, pinstriped double-breasted suit, on top of a light grey dress shirt, and polka-dotted lavender tie with a matching kerchief in his left breast pocket. It hugs his body nicely and shows off his perfect V-shaped torso. Delicious!

Adrian is definitely making a statement: he's original, invigorating, sophisticated, and ready to work. This is power dressing Adrian Ivashkov style. And the man knows he looks sexy.

"Done undressing me Rose?"

I tilt my head to the side and take the time for my eyes to travel all over him. I say languidly, "Baby, if I do undress you, you wouldn't want me to stop."

I laugh when he whimpers softly. I turn towards the door and signal that we have to leave.

"Oh Rose! You are a tease but never follow it up." He sighs dramatically and follows me with a woe-be-me face while we walk towards the Court.

"Only with you Adrian," I chuckle. "But had you cleaned up that well before, instead of looking like a lush, I probably would have teased AND taken cared of you."

"Little Dhampir, we both know that is just an empty promise. Coz that damned taste of yours will always be for the unembellished, brooding, beefcake, caveman type. Very basic, too bland if you ask me."

"I like real meat! Besides, I do not like too many sauces or cream to disguise the taste, Ivashkov." I playfully spar.

"What a pity!... But I'm way pass the embellishments and the add-ons. I have moved on to a different lifestyle."

"Really? This is interesting. What may I ask are you into now?"

"Propagating! My aunt would have been proud of me. I am now into caretaking, growing, nurturing exquisite wee seedlings that need shelter, water and fertilizer. Then when it's the right time, loving. A lot of thorough loving."

I stop on my tracks. I growl, "Like a conscientious gardener."

Giving me a dreamy smile, "Exactly."

"Damn it Adrian! I told you to lay the hell off."

"But this Beckham needs a Victoria! I need my Spice." He sounds like a 12-year old kid bargaining with his Mom.

"She is not a Victoria and she's no chili either."

"Aaahh! She's hot as spice when she plays hard to get. I didn't know she has it in her to say those words. I tell you that potty mouth of her is a turn on."

I have to stop myself from giving him a roundabout kick. This man is so frustrating! I face him so he can see that I'm mad and not playing around anymore. I can't possibly shout at my Moroi in public so I limit myself to a whisper-shout.

"Back-off Ivashkov, you are playing a very dangerous game here! This is not like our time in St. Vladimir where you can drink and flirt like crazy. We are building a network here. We need everybody involved to trust us and be a hundred and one per cent sure that we are committed and dead serious on our plans. And that includes keeping your libido at a minimum while we are working! This is not Memphis to throw around your undies and play with any girl you want to swoon and fall on your knees!"

I am slightly taken aback when Adrian turns pale and see his eyes blazing. All this years that we've known each other, this is the first time I've seen him livid with anger. Well shit! I'm mad as hell too!

He pulled my arm with such strength that he almost dragged me at the back of an alley.

"Bullshit Rose! Who the hell do you think you are talking to?" Adrian is so intense that he's spitting saliva.

Well I'm not backing off because of a small amount of spit. I spew my own as well.

"I know you Adrian Ivashkov, you get off when a woman falls for you. You just looove the chasing game. Well Cassanova, you are not playing this game to jeopardize our cause. And even if I have to look for another way to stop these crazy laws, I will not hesitate to drop you coz no way am I letting you play my bestfriend!" Destiny be damned!

"Excuse me! You accuse me of being a player?" Adrian's eyes are threatening to pop-out of the socket.

"I need my Spice...Nurturing...Fertilizer...Thorough loving. Those are sexual innuendos, Adrian. You bet I'm accusing you of playing your games!"

"So what? May I remind you of a very important fact in history... YOU played me! I NEVER played you! Despite all those sexual innuendos that came out of my mouth, they were directed ONLY to you! When did you see me flirt with somebody else when I was baring my feelings for you back then?"

I stop my ranting. I am flabbergasted at Adrian's anger and what he said.

"I was not the one who offered myself for a couple of plastics so I can go looking halfway around the world for my Strigois boyfriend!... I did not turn to the next warm body just to feel good because her former Strigois boyfriend turned her away!"

That definitely shut me up. I feel so ashamed again. He's so right. I did play him, although I did not intend to. Can I ever make it right between me and my good friend? Will I ever deserve this friendship? Rosemary Hathaway, What. Do. You. Do?...

I Cry!

"Aaahh! That's not fair Rose, you know I can't stand see you cry!" He whines.

I Cry Louder.

"You're a Guardian for crying out loud! Guardians don't cry." Adrian seems disgusted but begging now.

"Why did you have to bring that up again? _(Sob! Sob!)_ I thought we talked about it years ago and put that all in the past. _(Sob!) _We even have a friendship anniversary!" _(Copious tears resurges)_

I hear him chanting _I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm an ass._

I start calming down. "You are an ass. You know I tried to make us work. _(Sniff!) _And you yourself said we're better off as friends." I pout. For emphasis.

I know it's dirty of me to cry, but that's the only thing I can think of for our argument to stop escalating. And I do feel bad for what happened but we both know it's water under the bridge... But I pause to reconsider. I study him closely, looking all guilty and feeling miserable. There is truth in what he said. He really was serious about me back in St. Vladimir and had sincere intentions. If you look beyond his I'm-the-answer-to-your-wet-dreams facade, I know Adrian Ivashkov is an honorable and good man.

"Vasilissa huh?"

"Yeahhh..." He blushes. Wow!

"Why?" I prod, my eyebrows touching my hairline.

"She's different from before, she's a woman now. She's intelligent, confident. She can be extremely sly and there's arrogance in her, because she knows her worth. But she feels deeply, I see it in her eyes when she thinks no one is looking. And she worries a lot for others. I don't know if she even thinks about herself. She's like you. She kicks ass!"

"Actually, she reminds me of your aunt, Queen Tatiana."

"That too!" Adrian has this goofy smile on his face.

Hah! My boy is in love. Shucks! I feel like Mama Bear, proud that her son is all grown up.

"Let's go. I don't want you to be late."

We head back to the street and continue our way to Court.

I wait...

I know it's coming...

Any minute now...

"So you'll help me?"

I smirk. "Of course."

Then we enter the august halls of the Royal Court.

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_AN: I am thinking of doing outtakes for the more mature contents. COR is a T rating and I would like to keep it that way. When I am done blushing (my Mama taught me to be a lady!) I will attempt to write the lemons and post an FYI here. _


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